for what its worth..i have a totally different opinion of parents who commit suicide (or make a sincere attempt) as i do of people who do not have children.
as someone who has been to the depth of hell and survived only due to my own lack of wordly knowledge (i guess i can thank my parents for the fact that they never let me go anywhere except the hall), and as someone who is currently a parent I can say that i cannot comprehend or begin to comprehend how a parent can do it and leave their child behind. not a young child..no way. i just cant fathom it. it sickens me to even think it.
i went through the worst days of my life when my son was a few months old to about 8 months old. i was in the darkest pit of hell with the jw elders as the devils who nearly caused me a nervous breakdown. no family support only judgement, no friendship only looks of judgement and scorns from former friends, no co-parent only single motherhood, a full time high stress job, 2 hour commute, few hours of sleep a night and a nursing child, struggling with trying drag myself to meetings so i could get reinstated and sitting in judgment by the judicial committee questioning my every thought and word all while fighting severe post partum depression.
i had reason and opportunity to check out and had i not been a mother i would likely have. but to me the only choice was to get myself together for my sons sake...checking out isnt an option for a parent as far as i'm concerned. instead of checking out i said screw the jw's and with some help from a 'wordly' person, eventually checked myself into a hospital to get the help i needed.
i'll tell you something brad, i am absolutely sure that a good number of suicides could be prevented if there wasnt such a stigma involved with people who seek help for mental health issues. a stigma created and continued by 'the other people'...the ' i've never felt suicidal' people.
they dont seem to understand that you can recover from poor mental health just as you can recover from a physical illness. as with physical illnesses some mental health issues can take longer to recover from and some are ongoing. just as someone has to continually treat their diabetes or herpes for the rest of their lives some have to treat their mental health for the rest of their lives.
if someone was physically sick people would not tell them not to go to the doctor or just to deal with themselves. but if someone goes to the doctor for a emotional or mental health problem they are stigmatized as a psycho who, even years later, could just snap and go postal at any second. Or if they have a bout of mild depression, anger or anxiety they are treated as if they are having a mental breakdown.
people are ignorant about so many things and dont even know enough to realize it.
k i'll pass the soap box on to someone else now. lol