Idiotic things only a jw would say

by micheal 59 Replies latest jw friends

  • Pleasuredome
    Pleasuredome
    "Where else can we go?"

    to the pub!

  • micheal
    micheal
    "Where else can we go?"
    to the pub!

    HERE HERE!!!

  • 4JWY
    4JWY

    micheal :

    Sounds like that CO is promoting those feng shu (sp?) ideas. Seems I remember the condemnation of that in the mags!

  • micheal
    micheal
    Sounds like that CO is promoting those feng shu (sp?) ideas

    Sorry, what does feng shu mean?

  • HeyNow!
    HeyNow!

    Elder.. " did you orgasm?"

    Teenage HeyNow.. " yeah, duh!?!"

  • micheal
    micheal

    I was once told by a C.O that if any worldly people were invited to a witness wedding those who serve on the body should not attend.

    Wow the love is so great!!

    Bunch of Freaks.

  • dh
    dh

    "it's not that you used bad language that concerns us, it's what you actually said." - my one and only counselling visit at the age of 17 in relation somethng i told a minesterial servants wife she could do.

    "we'll pray about for you"

    "that's certainly an interesting view"

    "you know we want you back" in conjunction with "but you know it's the truth, don't you?"

    "do we want to send our love, well, do we? huhhuh" - clap clap clap clap

    "jehovah, our loving kind heavenly father... blah blah blah, we would also like to pray for your spirit and guidance for our brothers in burundi and papua new guinnea"

    "damn i got a talk tonight!"

    "i'm off out on the work"

    my all time favourite...

    'I WAS STUMBLED'

  • DFWnonJW
    DFWnonJW
    it is demonic to be enslaved to any habit.

    You mean like attending meetings / bookstudies etc. each and every week year after year after .... ?

  • HappyDad
    HappyDad

    I can remember a DC back in the 1980's at Wheeling West Virginia where one of the major talks was about getting rid of your TV and a family that did so was on a symposium ( jw slang for group chat) I was supprised when the family came out on stage. The father was a "bro" I was working with in the glorious duty of "kitchen cleanup" and me being an A..Hole at the time wanted to know how me and my family could be so "holy" as to do this. Weeeelllllll.......my wife who was raised in the troof.........set my a__ straight about the TV ......

    Boy.....am I glad she had more sense than me.

    "If your job is making you miss meetings, it is a good idea to quit your job, trust in jehovah and make all the meetings, he will provide for you"

    A CO told my father in law who had 4 kids to do this in the 1960's. My great FIL was reproved for what he told the CO. (Bless you Dad)

    HappyDad

  • lisaBObeesa
    lisaBObeesa

    Spoken to me by a JW friend I grew up with:

    "I used to question all these things you are talking about, too. But then I got some advice that really helped me: Just don't think about the questions and stay busy going out in service. It worked: I never have a problem with those questions any more!"

    *******************************************

    Also:

    Last words on page 89 of the Live Forever Book:

    How good it is to know the truth about the dead! It can truly set one free from fear and superstition.

    Followed by the first words on page 90 of the Live Forever book:

    Wicked Spirits Are Powerful

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