has any one had this feeling

by Akid48 22 Replies latest jw experiences

  • SummerAngel

    Hi akid it's funny you ask this as I thought I was the only one to experience this as a child. I left 30 years ago.I was born in most family still in. As far back as I was old enough to consciously think so 5 or 6 dev by 7 I felt it didn't add up or as they say now 'something was off. I couldn't quantify this assumed it was me , feeling wouldn't go away just nagged and nagged. Incidentally I was there in 1974 at Twickenham Assembly in uk when the end of the world in 1975 was announced from the platform, so don't ever let anyone tell you it was just minions getting over keen it was announced. I never quite bought into it, I should have been keen for the new system but I wasn't.

    It wasn't just the above the samefeeling continued into my teens I grew to hate it, it was like this millstone, I thought why me why can't I be like everyone else. I guess what I would call this feeling now is cognitive dissonant but didn't know that word then. I'm sure this is why I never got baptised.

    This is your gut feeling, real truth doesn't feel the same. Real truth is like a still small voice of calm, it is a settled feeling and deep down knowledge that something is right, learn to discern the difference between the 2 in a world charlatans and loud voices your gut instinct is the best guide you have. If you retain a belief then your salvation is the most I important decision you will ever make think carefully who you put your trust in. Good luck.

  • Xanthippe

    When if was 18 or 19 I went to a convention and had the feeling that something was wrong, like something was missing. So not as young as you, I was a bit slow on the uptake. But I do remember when I was eight I was at the book study when I just started crying and couldn't stop. I was overwhelmed with the feeling that now, with experience of it, I would call raw grief, dreadful pain and sadness. What that was about I don't know.

  • flipper

    AKID- I totally know what you mean. I was born into the Witnesses and raised up by a strict elder father. ( Thank god I had a caring, loving mom. ) But I'd be chastised for listening to Led Zeppelin as a teenager, or if my sideburns got below the middle of my ear on my face I'd get, " you know that teenage brother in the kingdom hall ? You're an elders son and you are supposed to set an example ! If you grow your hair longer or your sideburns longer - he will too ! " I just argued with my dad that he shouldn't be " judging " me. Then he would come back and insist I had no " right " to insist on my rights- I had a duty to set a good " example " in the kingdom hall for other young people.

    Truth of the matter is my dad was worried about how it made HIM look as an elder. So I got a lot of that. I think as my teenage years ended- I began to quietly within myself see just how bat shit crazy this JW cult was and the way I was being raised was way out of line. You bet my friend, many of us have lived this indeed. Hang in there kiddo- we are here for you and with you as well. Take care, be strong until you can get old enough to find your own place to live. Peace out, Mr. Flipper

  • eyeuse2badub

    The things that really bothered me, even as a kid, was how the wt always tried to make some incident that happened thousands of years ago "foreshadow" some modern day event. How some bible character pictured a modern day "class" of people. How the freaky scriptures in revelation about pouring out bowls of god's anger were fulfilled by some stupid convention in the 1920's.

    So the words that made me have "that feeling" that something was off were;

    foreshadow-picture- fulfill- modern-day fulfillment- secondary fulfillment-anti-type-prophetic fulfillment.

    These were cult words and phrases to me as an young and teenage kid!

    just saying!

  • Akid48


    trust me only my close friends now that i live with jws and when i say something they get sad.They understand even being kids they know that whats going in a jw type life is not right.


    Man that sucks i dont know how my mind would deal with your dad i have bad for you man

  • Schnufti

    I had nightmares about being at meetings or conventions up to 6 years old.

    In my early teenage years I was very concerned that people would call us a cult. I found a lot of things odd and cult-like, such as the fake smiles or that all women had to wear skirts. And there were so many religions on this earth. Could it really be that I was so lucky to be born into the one true religion?

    I was on the right track, but I was under group pressure from JW friends and there wasn't really any alternative for me. It was never the question "if" I would get baptized, but "when".

    And all those "interested" ones were so weird. Not once have I seen an adult that came into the "truth" that made an intelligent impression.

  • Akid48


    im so glad that you talked about the fake smiles to be real for me you have to say somthing funny etc to make me smile i can never fake smile and some people make it seem like im wired for it but to me it creeps me out.and your right me and my brother get ask WHEN are you getting baptized not if.

  • Sorry

    When I was about 10 (when we seriously started going to the meetings), I remembered being bored out of my mind during the meetings. Whenever I told my parents this, they'd become extremely pissed off so I just kept my mouth shut. I did like the people though. They were quite fun and laid back. Then we moved to another one. I always felt kinda stressed and uneasy, because not only was it boring, but the people at my current one are very uptight and gossipy. Becomes really draining to have to constantly watch every little thing I say, do and wear because these people get offended by EVERYTHING.

    Now I know better. If you feel uncomfortable, you shouldnt be there.

  • Akid48


    Oh my god you hit the jackpot my family members get mad if I zone out I'm a kid I don't think the Kingdom Hall is a boring place in most kids eyes.

  • sinboi
    One more thing is i dont sleep the best so when i have to go to meeting and go pass the time i go to sleep for school.

    why don't you tell your dad you headache, cannot go meeting.

    When I don't feel like going to meetings, I tell my dad I headache, my leg cramp in school after basketball, etc...sometimes it works but sometimes it didn't...need to sign up for acting class. :{

    But if I fail at plan A, I have plan B. At the meeting, I closed my eyes and pretend to be sick. I no need to participate in the meeting....Haha..maybe the people here in this forum will PM you and tell you not to mix around with me..I bad influence...

    I have a picture for you...smile....

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