Beth Sarim’s suggestion of inflatable publishers for baptism seems fair and just. It can be a counterbalance to the untold numbers of deflated publishers around the globe in recent decades.
Stats just out: JWs in Wales decline (-3.4%) - COs primed for zero baptisms!
l heard a rumour that the borg just placed an order for 1 million blow up dummys.
Inflatable? Would this do?
In the article the author writes:
"This is more hopeful than it sounds. Rather than an Armageddon of death and fire, Witnesses say they believe the current, corrupt world will be replaced by a living heaven on earth, not a paradise obtainable only after death."
But Jehovah's Witnesses teach that Armageddon will be exactly that, death and fire for non-Witneses...
Yes, that raised my eyebrows too. The newspaper article also states:
some of their beliefs may come as a surprise.
You don't say! Er, an appealing mass homicide of all non JWs, the family-uniting love seen when parents shun their children, and the edifying truth that any type of education outside the cult is from Satan. Ooh..it's soooo inviting - let's all wax lyrical about these "beliefs"...
" When their are no baptismal candidates present when he asks for these to stand their is no need to ask the two questions or to say the prayer "
Isnt that a no brainer ? And they have only come out with that instruction only recently ?
Thinking back though when I was in I`m sure they did still go with that ritual !
That`s crazy .
Inflatables ,card board cut-outs I can just see it now ,and with the writing department juggling the numbers and counting the rubber duckies in the baptismal pool ?
WOW look at the growth achieved !
O.K I`m being stupid here .but any more so than what the G.B. come out with ?
They could start counting the overlapping baptisms from previous conventions?
Or allow baptism fractions: get baptised one body part at a time.
In the "Wales online" they interviewed some particularly well educated Witnesses, including a New convert. One woman from a Welsh farming community said the singing prayers in Welsh makes her cry.
Well a Welsh choir could sing their shopping list and it would make me cry.
I'm glad there's a decline, I have a special fondness for Wales. But this though:
This is more hopeful than it sounds. Rather than an Armageddon of death and fire, Witnesses say they believe the current, corrupt world will be replaced by a living heaven on earth, not a paradise obtainable only after death.
Edit: sorry just noticed already mentioned
Did you hear about the inflatable Publisher who took a short-cut while in F.S by climbing a barbed-wire fence, and got a puncture ?
An Elder remonstrated with him, and said, "You've let your family down, the Congregation down, and worst of all, you've let yourself down".