Start speaking in tounges and foam at the mouth.
Actually--whenever I hear "We've missed you" I always say..."really? I didn't know I was missing *stiff giggle*--here's my phone number gimme a call this week"--you NEVER hear back from them.
Hit Me With Some Snappy Comebacks Puleeeeeeeeze!!
by HadEnuf 37 Replies latest jw friends
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TheSilence
Do you? Really? Is that only because I'm here directly in your line of vision... or have you actually tried to contact me previous to this and I simply missed it? If that's the case I'll be happy to have lunch with you sometime where I wouldn't dream of putting you in spiritual danger by discussing any topic related to religion... however if your intent is to get me back to the hall I would suggest you start holding your breath.
Jackie
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blondie
Them: "We missed you."
Us: "It's been 3 years and we haven't heard from you."
Them, embarrased, "We don't have your phone number."
Us: "We have the same phone number and our address is still the same. It's in the phone book. You have a phone book right? Here let me write it down for you just in case your phone book is lost."
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RunningMan
I've always liked the response, "What, and return to the vomit?" when asked to come to a meeting. Of course, that tends to be a bit of a conversation stopper.....
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needs_lots
ask them if they heard what happened with the dreadful "vicki boer vs watchtower" case. This could bring on some good conversation. Then say "so glad i will never have to deal with them"
just my 2 cents
then let me know what they say ha ha
vic
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HadEnuf
Yup...I just knew I was dealing with a bunch of genius's here at this forum. I am gonna print out all these wise cracks and start practicing them all week (fortunately the shower isn't until the 18th)...I'm not too good at memorizing but I have a whole lot of those 3 X 5 note cards left over from when I did ministry school talks back in the 80's!!! I just knew they might come in handy some day.
Thanks people...you MADE MY DAY!!! (Boy oh boy...do I just wish I had the guts to say some of this stuff you have come up with!!) Cathy L.
P.S. I can't even pick a favorite out of all these because they're all such a hoot. Glad I had my Depends on while reading these!!
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Valis
Here's my number and please do stop by...I have some interesting information for you.
Sincerely,
District Overbeer
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SheilaM
YOU missed ME....Ya Right<burst into a hoot of laughter>...holds sides ...<keep laughing> wipe eyes and snort "that was a good one."
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kgfreeperson
I really come down on the side of "thank you!" or a wide-eyed maintenance of eye contact. You won't be swayed by any original way they come up with for saying "you should be coming to meetings" and they aren't going to be swayed by any original way you come up with to say "mind your own business." And any attempt to make any JW who is coming to a babyshower in the hopes of winning your daughter-in-law back to the congregation sorry they said anything, is more likely to just make your daughter-in-law uncomfortable. But you knew that. I do think fantasizing all the things you could say is a great idea, though! And good luck--I hope you and your daughter-in-law have a great time. And, I'm hoping the JWs go against tradition and actually bring neat stuff for the baby!
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HadEnuf
Decisions, decisions, decisions. Now I could take the "high road" and be all lovey dovey and forgiving (which I am not) and just make happy and let it go at that. But then, I ask of you, how could I face myself in the morning for carrying on such hypocrisy? (It's bad enough just looking in the mirror in the morning without seeing a hypocrite looking back at me too besides that fat, old lady with grey hair!) BUT...I just feel that too often these people get away with too much crapola and they need a good slap (figurative of course, though I would love to hit most if not every JW I used to know in my former life) in the face as a WAKE UP YOU IDIOT call. Though that might just fly right over their empty heads. (I am in a particularly foul mood today...sorry!) Now I know it won't bother my beloved daughter-in-law one little bit if I was to stir things up a bit...she is quite the rebel herself and would have no hard feelings towards me if I told a few people off. Oh dear...what to do...what to do. Personally I am leaning towards the not so nice side of me! Jeeeeeeeeeeeeshhhhhhh...I shoulda notta even started this thread!!! (No...I am glad I did; you're all giving me much food for thought and many good laughs!) Cathy L.