Any former elders brains I could pick?

by BarelyThere 56 Replies latest jw friends

  • Crazyguy
    Cut her a break some of you people. Lets not forget she s a raised JW. She's still coming to grips with a lot of things and is still years from being mentally out of the cult. This cult puts all sorts of people in bad positions of life.
  • joe134cd
  • berrygerry

    I disagree with the people who say you'll never get reinstated if you marry the other guy.

    I've seen five years, although that was a former elder, who tried to get reinstated in the wrong congo.

  • Hadriel
    @berrygerry brings up a good point. it may be best for her to change congregations pronto. This can have significant effect on lessening the time. In fact I would greatly encourage this.
  • brandnew
  • Wasanelder Once
    Wasanelder Once
    If you move to the new congregation and apply for reinstatement they MUST contact the original committee. The new committee will refer to the first one. It is the original which makes the decision to reinstate unless time has passed and the members are no longer available either through death, deletion or disfellowshiping. Sorry guys but you are stuck with that committee.
  • clarity

    Wow a ton of good advice on here for you, and Dario jesus this the best advice absolutely!

    "One final tip: read ex-member stories from OTHER religions. Reddit has sub forums for ex-mormons, ex-7th day, ex scientologists... watch TV shows & documentaries about people who've left a different religion and it's amazing, the similarities. All cults use the same tactics. Those people suffer the same thoughts and fears exjws do ("OMG what have I done? I'm gonna die at Armeggedon!" "Oh sure, the mormons are effed up, that's crazy, but... JWs have the truth! Right???"). On those forums, you'll see posts of letters, emails and text messages from friends, family & ranking people from their cult with the exact same guilt-tripping and manipulative tactics. ALL cults do this, young lady. Your are a victim of cult abuse and you need to hear that! Know it. Investigate it. A 19th Century New England PRINTING COMPANY is not god!!!!

    please stay in touch with us and ENJOY your recent freedom. I mean it! Enjoy!"


  • Nameless

    Well the issue isn’t about how to get reinstated. You’ve got other things you’re going to need to deal with first. You said you were in a bad marriage, but it was a marriage nonetheless. Regardless of the reason, adultery wasn’t the answer. You stated you regret it, but honestly you should have just divorced him and saved him the turmoil of dealing with the infidelity. No need to look back now. If some are thinking that the ORG doesn’t allow divorce as they say, because she was stuck in a bad marriage, well they don’t allow adultery either. A divorce is hard enough, but to top it off with adultery, man that can really mess with a person’s head! However, this is about you. Outside of abuse (physical or emotional), it’s a 50/50 failure in your marriage (not talking about the adultery, that’s on you). You said you were too young to get married and made a bad decision. Well you did make another bad decision when you cheated, and if you marry the person you cheated with, you WILL make another bad decision. You need to take time for some therapy and work some kinks out in your own head. Going back to the ORG is going to guilt you up and eventually friends and family will say NO MAS in talking to you if your still disfellowshipped. If you try to get reinstated, you will be monitored because they are not letting up on getting people back in too fast (unless you’re connected). You’re looking for an emotional attachment because of everything that’s going on. You most likely feel lost, bewildered and confused. Then take the time to work on yourself and get strong without figuring out another relationship. Take the time to learn TTATT. Since you’re D’fed you have more freedom to check things out without having someone looking over your shoulder. Hey, we all f**k up, we just want you to learn to be finally free!

  • Makemeanunbeliever
    She caused the drama in her life and here. Drama will always follow her unless she change's her outlook. Good luck to her.


  • Hadriel

    @Wasanelder you know as well as I do that this sometimes expedites the reinstatement at times. This is because the new brothers in the new hall are not emotionally invested. This allows pressure to naturally build with them and the original brothers.

    Yes the orig. committee holds the cards ultimately but the pressure from those brothers in the new hall has been proven to expedite matters. Seen it first hand more than one.

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