JW renaming things: "It's Not this, it's ....."

by Muddy Waters 53 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • waton

    it is not the pastor, nor company servant, or congregation servant, not even the presiding overseer, no, it is the Coordinator of the body of elders.

  • eyeuse2badub

    It's not fu*king lying; it's THEOCRATIC warfare!

    It's not a fu*king meaningless ritual: it's a CELEBRATION of the lord's death!

    it's not frickin' tithing; it's our pledged contributions!

    It's not recruiting; it's preaching! lol

    just saying!

  • Ding

    They change terminology on a regular basis -- presiding overseer to COBOE, for example.

    If anyone has been missing meetings, it will be apparent from the lingo they use.

  • Are you serious
    Are you serious

    It's not a sedan, it's a service car.

  • Muddy Waters
    Muddy Waters

    These are great, so true!

    Pontoon, I am so sorry, I meant to like your post and my finger slipped on the dislike by mistake! And then I thought I could "toggle" it off, and then, eek, 2 dislikes showed up! I've hit "like" so hopefully it's all sorted out!! 😳

  • Pete Zahut
    Pete Zahut

    It's not a flip-flop of our beliefs or a contradiction of everything we've called the truth for the last 100 years, it's an adjustment, it's new light just when we needed it most.

    It's not materialism...It's Jehovah blessing us for our efforts. He's "adding all these other things to us" for putting him first.

    We're not soliciting Church membership or looking for new recruits, we're inviting honest hearted ones who are sighing and crying, to study our literature and attend our meetings, build their lives around our religion and get baptized but only after first acknowledging that they now identify themselves as Jehovah's Witnesses.

  • Chook

    It's not blood it's only fractions of blood, it's not the community service it's the field service, it's not money its contributions, it's not 1914 it's a fucking a hundred years later which is called overlapping.

  • KiddingMe

    It's not one generation that make up a generation, but several overlapping generations that make up a generation.

    It's not using the rank and file for free labor, but giving them the "privledge" to clean tiolets, windows, mow lawn, plant flowers, paint, participate in building projects etc.

    It's not cruel to disfellowship, but loving discipline from Jehovah.

  • Dreamerdude

    It's not covering up mistakes. It's not admitting mistakes. It's not even making stuff up or lying. It's all wonderful new light.

  • Muddy Waters
    Muddy Waters

    Thought of another one:

    It's not masturbation, it's self-abuse.

    Good grief.

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