The real story became apparent after a couple of years. It's like peeling an onion one layer at a time. Everybody is very secretive and nobody there will level with you about what is wrong. You have to find out on your own, one rude awakening after another. I was on the fringes of the religion
That has most definitely been the experience many of us have had. I recall the days before the internet when I would watch elders on news reports or documentaries (eg suffer the little children) refuse to answer questions. They would walk past the journalists without saying a word. I always thought that very arrogant and bizarre. Cognitive dissonance allowed me to brush these thoughts aside by thinking 'oh ...they are not wanting to cast their pearls before swine' 🙄
I also felt I couldn't ask 'the why' questions, because of the group think culture within the organisation. Questioning the GB is tantamount to questioning God. To my shock and horror when the internet came along, I discovered that numerous individuals were disfellowshipped for questioning the teachings of the GB.
The secrecy of this organisation sickens me. The Australian royal commission truly exposed the secretive, deceptive nature of the organisation. Thank God for the age of the internet.