Disillusioned JW
Jeffro regarding your advice to me that I "... should consider carefully the scholarship of Jehovah's Witnesses by means of their publication", I have studied many of their publications. I was raised as a JW from infancy, enrolled in the Theocratic Ministry School at age 8, became baptized at age 15, became a ministerial servant at age 19 (shortly after I began attending college), became a regular pioneer at just before age 22 (a few months before receiving my Bachelor Science Degree in Business Administration), and later gave some public talks. But during that long time period I did not "... find Bible Study a joyful experience". Furthermore, from teen years onward I noticed that the WT on numerous times changed their teachings, resulting in them declaring their abandoned teachings as false, though previously saying that JWs could not speak against those teachings without being considered an apostate and thus shunned by JWs. A number of times why I was an JW I noticed that some of WT's then current teachings were problematic, but because I was baptized by them and felt pressured to remain an active JW, I pushed to the back of my mind the problems I saw regarding some WT teachings. Instead of Bible study, I wanted to spend my time in secular pursuits, such as studying science and inventions and trying to invent something myself, and trying to make a lot of money in the stock market. Eventually starting in 1995 I started seeing major problems with some core teachings of the WT teachings (including their claim of the governing body being anointed by Jehovah) and God) and thus in about 2001 I stopped being active as a JW and began independent study of the Bible. I also began collecting very old WT books (including ones by Rutherford an Russell) and seeing what they reveal about the degree of credibility of the WT's claim of being chosen by Jehovah God as his instrument and his channel of communication.
During my independent study I started enjoying Bible study because I was free to study about the Bible what I wanted, the way I wanted, and was free to reject teachings which seemed false to me. But after I started seeing numerous major problems with even the Bible, after I discovered that biological evolution is true and that there never was a global flood on Earth, and after I discovered that Jehovah God and a supernatural Jesus Christ are both unreal, I began loosing my joy in studying the Bible. I am thus now at the point where I consider ceasing all study of the Bible, but my desire to convince others to become atheistic naturalists compels me to continuing studying the Bible (so I can reveal problems of the Bible effectively to others). I am trying to ween myself from studying the Bible, much as I have mostly weened myself from studying WT literature.
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I am saddened to read of your experience but sadly your journey is typical of many former Witnesses. It would appear that you have dug an 'intellectual grave ' for yourself and have not developed the necessary tools to build up your faith.
My experience as an active Witness for 60 years is one of developing an inquiring mind and independent thinking reinforced by a deep knowledge of the Bible and WT Theology along with a passion for Philosophy. I have acquired Degrees in Religious Studies and Philosophy as a mature age student and was in the habit of doing much research at a local theological seminary library dealing with many questions and issues raise whilst pioneering.
I have debated at some length with Jewish rabbis of an ultra orthodox sect of Judaism- Hasidim over the Daniel's prophecy of the 70 weeks of years and many other subjects to boot. One prominent rabbi was an academic-Dean of the Faculty of Mathematics who gave me a copy of a scientific paper published in a leading journal disproving Evolution on the basis of statistics.
By means of my academic studies and consulting widely all of the leading Bible commentaries- Catholic, Jewish, Protestant and Evangelical that the Witnesses do indeed have the 'Truth' and are the True religion despite the many challenges that confront the nature of discipleship.In addition one of the most important tools in scholarship is access to academic Journals which have always for many decades formed a large part of my Theocratic Toolbox. In short, my Toolbox includes WT Publications- past and present, major Bible Commentaries and Academic Journals.
This is where our critics and apostates fail in that they lack the scholarship or the academic tools in order to defend their faith or uphold their faith and that is not only a problem for you but for the likes of Jeffro and the late Alan F- May he rest in peace!!
scholar JW
