I came here three years ago for support and to make friends

by KateWild 75 Replies latest jw friends

  • DJS
    DJS

    Kate,

    You've always led with your heart. That is both endearing and frustrating. Your courage to lock wits with Cofty on a repeated basis has my admiration. That you do so while maintaining composure suggests you have more emotional intelligence than you give yourself credit.

    Your reasons for being on the site are typical and much more common than mine, which is a big reason I at times come across as an arrogant, uncaring ass.

    I left the cult over 20 years ago and immediately immersed myself in much more important pursuits, such as raising my beautiful brats, going to college, Forrest Gumping my way to excellent adventure, traveling, and THE most important one: spending time with a wide variety of hot girls with big, um, well you know, in short skirts.

    It wasn't until 3 years ago I had anything to do with the cult, and that was when I joined this site.

    I'm arrogant enough to think I have something positive to share. That's it. If I sometimes seem to lack the depth of feeling for the broken, the misfits and the perpetual victims coming out of the Dark Tower, that is much of the reason why.

    That, and sometimes I'm just an ass.

  • MarkofCane
    MarkofCane

    Hi Kate

    Interesting perceptive on internet forums. I guess I never really considered making friends online, considering i'm trying to remain anonymous and all. My main reason for coming here has been for support and helping new one lurking unsure 'what it is they are reading'. There are so many things going through a persons head when they first arrive, they are troubled and confused, depressed and angry. Then they go back to meeting and they are beat up some more...I know because I/we went through it. You feel like you are getting beat up from both sides, until it just clicks. Slowly thing become clearer and you realize you have been a victim of a cult, sometime no fault of our own just unfortunate to be born into it.

    ExJW sites are life saving and life changing....I owe a lot to this site especially, since it was the first one I landed on and finally woke. I must say, I don't agree with half the stuff that I read here and I don't feel the need to comment or debate on every subject on this forum. What I do like is the diverse perspective's and ideas that are shared on this site and other like it, by people that sat in a KH and where subjected to the same life choices as me because of there alliance to a mind control cult. We are inescapably connected because of the cards we were dealt. This has become incredibly obvious to me as i read more and more experiences and think to myself........"he lived my life"........"that is me"........"do I know that person?" And sometimes I have thought "I would of liked, to known that person as a friend, we would of got along".

    I guess what I'm trying to say is don't feed some much into it, its not healthy. Its just a online forum with different individuals with different life experiences who you will not always agree with. Just like in real life you wouldn't invite everyone you meet to your home?..........its the same here.

    Hope the best for you and your journey.

  • MarkofCane
    MarkofCane

    DJS

    I think that was one of the kindest posts ive read from you in a long time....you do have a heart.

  • DJS
    DJS

    DJS showing heart and providing sweetly worded relationship advice:


  • notsurewheretogo
    notsurewheretogo

    I'm active on many forums...JW and non JW related...I don't class anyone I know on them as "friends"....friends are for real life...forums and the internet is a very hard place to form friends for the same reason that it can be abused...you can hide what you are...

  • tornapart
    tornapart

    I think it's very easy to get hurt online because all you have are words. It's easy to take offence at what people write and become oversensitive about it. What you don't have is body language, voice intonation, facial expressions, any of those things that you get in real life. If you join a forum you have to develop a thick skin. I remember over a decade ago I joined a forum and made lots of 'friends'. It was non-JW mutually interest based. I remember being in floods of tears over perceived hurts, until I realise it was stupid. Why be hurt by something, someone (whom you've never met) says? Most people you meet online are simply acquaintances, if you're lucky a handful will become good friends... as you've found.

  • KateWild
    KateWild
    for a time made me a specific target here. They are gone, I'm still here making my way in life with the info and support I find here from others new and old. You have helped me greatly, Kate.- Blondie

    Wow someone making you a target. You very rarely do anything controversial. You mainly research the evidence and state the facts. Out of all the people who are here I would not expect you would have been targeted. Thank you so much for telling me that I have helped you. I had no idea I could help someone as experienced, and intelligent and balanced as you. You make me realise that no matter how long we are out, we can always use help. Thank you Blondie xx

  • KateWild
    KateWild
    That you do so while maintaining composure suggests you have more emotional intelligence than you give yourself credit. - DJS

    Thanks for saying I debate with composure. I think others would disagree. But glad you think that lol xx

  • KateWild
    KateWild
    Just like in real life you wouldn't invite everyone you meet to your home?..........its the same here. - MarkofCane

    Yes I just realised today this point. And I have real life plans with three of my online friends in the near future. In both theirs an my homes.

  • Landy
    Landy
    You might find me very strange and odd because I have a disability. Yes I am like this in real life and many people discriminate against me due to my disability. I am used to it.

    Excellent response - using your disability (?) to point score on the internet. Well done.

    Good luck getting the attention you so obviously crave.

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