Time to Spill my Guts

by Hadriel 52 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Beth Sarim
    Beth Sarim
    Amen to that statement. !!!! That's amazing. That's a home run swing.
  • Hadriel
    Hadriel

    @Giordano

    Great point on the blood cards. I'll revoke those puppies today! Nope none baptized thankfully. I never bought into the get baptized at a young age movement. I used to joke if they get any younger we'll be sprinkling water on babies just like the Catholics before long LOL.

    That quote you just posted is flat out Gold. Wow does that hit the mark or what!

  • Freesoul
    Freesoul

    Welcome to the Forum and congratulations on finding your freedom, and that your wife is on the same page.

    You may think that your children are happy and that you don't want to change their friends, but don't worry just think of your life when you were their age. If you tell them the truth, they will accept their new found freedom quicker than you. They will be so happy to live a normal life. Once they accept that this religion for all BS you can ask them whether they would prefer to stay in the same school or whether they would prefer to move.

    Best of luck in any decisions you are going to make, take care

  • ToesUp
    ToesUp

    We also left when our kids were teens. I don't think they really felt like a part of the congregation. You see, my husband was not an MS or elder. Like you, he never had the urge to reach out. I wonder why! (sarcasm) This has a large impact on how kids are treated in the congregation. No uber Daddy, no invites!

    Our kids are fine. We talk to them about things . We are very open and honest with both of them. Kids are not stupid, they know more than we think. We never encouraged them to get baptized. I wonder why! (sarcasm again).

    Be honest and candid with your kids. They can see the cracks, just as well as we can. Our children have found more genuine, caring and kind friends in the "world." I truly believe if our home was destroyed this evening our friends and neighbors would drop everything to help. People are typically kinds by nature. We've just been brainwashed all of our lives that every non JW is sporting a pitch fork and horns. NOT TRUE!

  • Hadriel
    Hadriel

    @ToesUp

    Very well said. Yep we are pretty honest and direct. They have been told to reach out at school. To get involved in other things. Being able to play sports was pretty much music to their ears. I don't want to give too much away as to identity (my apologies) but growing up I was very good at a sport. Scholarships and the whole nine yards. I wasn't supported. It was likely I could have turned pro. I had been told that for years. I was forced to abandon it and regretted it ever since. It had nothing to do with the money or fame. I loved that darn game and still do.

  • ToesUp
    ToesUp

    That is sad that so many of us had to give up things we may have been good at. Broken dreams and broken promises.

    You are doing a great job. Direct the kids in what they love to do. We always tell our children, "we weren't allowed to pursue this or that because the end was so close. You both have the opportunity to do what we couldn't." They are doing great!

    Kids are resilient! I tell my spouse all the time, "if we can just keep them away from the JW mentality, they will be fine. lol They are fine and your children will be fine too. Love them, guide them, listen to them and give them room to thrive. You sound like a terrific parent! Rock on Hadriel!

  • Hadriel
    Hadriel

    @ToesUp great advice appreciate ya.

    Thanks to everyone in here today!

  • fleshyheadedmutant
    fleshyheadedmutant

    Welcome. So glad your family is able to reason and is with you.

    What you can do now is have patience, and just spend time with your family. Why not take a weekend or two and go someplace interesting together-camping, a trip to a nearby site?

    Just put some distance between your family and the KHall.

    Everyone needs time to think and plan. Ask your children what they'd like for their futures. Definitely emphasize education for them.

    Wishing the best for your family.

  • Hadriel
    Hadriel
    Thanks @FleshlyHeadedMutant
  • Giordano
    Giordano

    When we got out in the mid to late 1960's I had already crashed and burned a couple of years earlier.

    I remember the exact moment.......... I was walking around our smallish town in NW PA in my grey sport jacket white shirt and tie with book bag in hand making a couple of back calls.........I'm taking my time letting two calls take about two hours even though there was a quick Not Interested! at one call and no one home at the other.

    So I'm standing on the sidewalk wondering if I should go back to the drug store lunch counter and get another coke or just give it up and head home.

    It was hot, I had my jacket off my tie loose.....so i'm standing there and I hear engines approaching down Main street getting louder. The ground starts shaking then 25, 30 guys on bikes. Tats, leathers, chicks riding in back, chicks with tats wearing leather halters and shorts, a lot of flesh showing....all holding on to their guys. Rock Music playing........ the same song coming off their radio's..................it's 'I can't get No Satisfaction' by the Stones.

    The noise was considerable...the smell of suntan lotion, sweat and gasoline it was like perfume.

    Then his one gal looks at me and she's very hot.........taps her guy and points at me like I was an exhibit in a museum, I'm standing there sweating......... my stupid book bag in hand and I'm thinking 'I can't get no Satisfaction'.........got that right!

    My world view tilted......I've GOT to start making some damn changes.

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