Why do ones that got out come back in?

by moreconfusedthanever 55 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Giordano

    Welcome More Confused! How does it feel to be taken seriously by all of us? You've just joined your lost tribe. We may all be on slightly different journey's but we understand what we are talking about.

    Pale said it best

    People who come back never fully purged the propaganda from themselves.

    When you come to that folk in the road you have to make a choice. Leaving a religion like the JW's means you have to make choices often difficult choices.

    Too many leave but have not purged out the teachings especially if you were hard wired to believe from birth. That's a lot of wiring that you need to work through. The good news is that the JW's can not retain 67% of their born-ins. They leave. 35% of Mormon's leave......... probably 50% to 60% of Catholics just come for Christmas services, weddings and funerals. In the Christian world people are no longer willing to be controlled by their religion.

    In today's information world there is no complete, accurate religion out their. It's all made up.

    The best way to remember the JW construct is to understand that it's a death cult. Be it the blood ban, be it Armageddon, be it the old and new testament it's always about righteous killing.

    Sitting around in the KH waiting for the world and all that live in it....be destroyed is the only message the JW's have.

    This is what a person needs to understand about a religion like the JW's:

    All active mass movements strive, therefore, to interpose a fact-proof screen between the faithful and the realities of the world. ...by claiming that the ultimate and absolute truth is already embodied in their doctrine and that there is no truth nor certitude outside it. ...To rely on the evidence of senses and of reason is heresy and treason. It is startling to realize how much unbelief is necessary to make belief possible. What we know as blind faith is sustained by innumerable unbelief's.

    Eric Hoffer writing about The True Believer

  • ToesUp

    In WT land you have instant "friends." These "friends" will drop you like a bad habit as soon as you don't tow the WT line. Not worth it!

  • Closer to Fine
    Closer to Fine

    I read every post on this thread and realized (with much sadness) that almost every single reason mentioned for going back applies to my husband, who is in the process of going back. He isn't df'd, in fact he's never been baptized but wants to be. I feel helpless and don't think there is anything I can do to change his mind. The emotional blackmail and shunning from family in particular worked on him.

  • LongHairGal

    In reading the posts here about those that return to the JWs after being out and free, there is a common denominator in many cases:..family in the religion.

    I never had family there as I joined as a young adult. I guess it's a blessing in disguise that I was treated so negatively and narrowly escaped being damaged further. I had few friends there and even those were conditional. I planned my "fade" a few years prior to leaving and I reconnected with relatives and old friends.

    I never entirely bought their "paradise" teaching so there's no sentimentality about that. I was just disappointed about seeing an end to "evil" on the earth. But, I don't need to be sitting in a Kingdom Hall for that.

    Other people return for the reasons stated: they never purged themselves of the beliefs and/or they are lonely and never replaced the association they had in the religion.

  • stuckinarut2

    Great thread! And welcome!

    As a side point to this, NEVER assume that an inactive witness might be "awake to TTATT" (the truth about the truth)!

    Often, those very inactive ones are still emotionally and mentally trapped...and if they hear someone like us divulge our doubts, they will be the first to call the elders to rat one out!

  • Wake Me Up Before You Jo-Ho
    Wake Me Up Before You Jo-Ho

    @stuckinarut2 It's their way of redeeming themselves before Jehovah (WT) and using their "outing" of an apostate as a means to make up for inactivity.

  • littlerockguy


    You are so right about that! I had made some scathing remark about the organization on Facebook and I had cousins who were either longterm inactive and some not even baptized but became active and baptized and I was quickly deleted off their friend's list and have been avoided by them ever since.


  • mentalclarity

    1)They held onto the belief it was true or it doesn't matter because they feel comfortable in the environment.

    2)They lack a social network to replace family/friends. I left and instantly got involved with the "wrong" crowd which seemed to prove that all worldly people were evil. Had I found a nice/healthy circle of people I probably would not have returned.

  • StephaneLaliberte

    From time to time, I find myself dream about going back, however, it would be as an "infiltrator". I would go back for a few years and basically keep a recording device on all the time, taking notes and records of all the bad things that are said "behind closed doors". This would likely be grounds for a very good 1 hours investigative report on TV, a book, etc.

    The issue however is that I cannot do this as long as my kids are minors. So, this would be in several years from now. Also, doing something like this would be somewhat of a part time job. So, I would need to find a way to make a decent living working part time. Finally, it is like infiltrating the mafia. You may go about your daily life and be snitched by any JW that happens to drive by while your taking a smoke and you are done!

    If for some reason, I am still on web sites like this one in 20 years from now, I might actually consider this for real though.

  • Moster

    heavy brainwashing - plain and simple

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