Havent gone to the kingdom hall in ten years but may have to go back...

by Joliette 64 Replies latest jw experiences

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  just fine

  One thing that leaving the JWs taught me is that I have to be able to take care of myself. I am female as well.

  When I left I was completely alone and cut off from family and friends. I had bad things happen and had to deal with them on my own. (Car accident, injuries, other health issues) There were no safety nets, no home to run to. I did it, I learned, I survived, and then thrived.

  The witnesses don’t care for their own unless they get something in return. Create your own safety net, learn to rely on yourself. Looking for a man, a religion, or a parent as a safety net is leaving your security in someone else’s hands........ I’ll never do that again.

  The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago, the 2nd best time is now.
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  Joliette

  I should have left completely by the time I was at least 21 and acted like it never happened. I had my own place back then. Sadly I was still attending meetings even tho I had my own place.

  The mind control that they use is irreversible. That mind control is very powerful.
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  LongHairGal

  JUST FINE:

  You are super-right that you have to take care of yourself as a female..and I’m glad you learned how when you left the religion!

  I came into the JWs as a young working adult. I couldn’t get over how much resentfulness I got from people there (both male and female) because I worked to support myself! This concept was so alien to them! I had Stepford-type wives with a 1950s mentality who acted like I was an aberration and I had very few friends there. Years later I ended up walking away from the religion and in time I Retired.

  This past year (2020) with the Covid crisis I read how the JWs wanted people to donate all sorts of goods (food and otherwise)..and THEY would decide who was needy and would get whatever, etc. I thought to myself: if I were gullible enough and did not prepare for MY future I would have been so screwed it wouldn’t have been funny!.. I would have found MYSELF looking for charity and would have been at the mercy of petty elders and other JWs!!! 😳 So, all the idiots who criticized me and made remarks about not being ‘spiritual’ because I worked full time...can go take a flying leap.

  I cannot stress enough that if a woman does not get married and have a man support her..she HAS to get an education and a career of some sort to provide for herself!!! And she has a relatively small window of time to do it. It doesn’t matter that we are in the 21st century. This fact did not change.

  The OP is still young enough to do this and I wish her all the best.
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  ScenicViewer

  The mind control that they use is irreversible.

  Not so. When you realize it's mind control it is completely reversible.

  However I also realize that some people need their cult - they cannot survive without it. As you mentioned earlier, suicides are way to common among both active JWs and ex-JWs. I suppose it's better to be in a cult and be alive than to be away from the cult and not be alive.

  All the best to you, whatever you choose.
  
  
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  Joliette

  That's if you can or are allowed to have a career. Having a career is a privilege. I've had jobs but I do not have a career. Especially the college thing, that's a whole other subject.

  No, I am not lazy. I've always been able to keep a job but I DO NOT have a career. You can have a job all day, but having a career is different.

  When it comes to the mind control thing, it all comes down to the individual person. Some people can break free from it, some people CANNOT. It's almost like a cancer that you think has gone away, but it always comes back. I'm African American and the Christian culture is so strong, that it's impossible to fight against. I'm a humanist, but most people that I associate with do not understand that. My J dub aunt called me a Scientologist???

  Even when it comes to my family, it seems like things are getting better, they always get worse. My mom has undiagnosed bipolar disorder and goes on her rants and raves. Nice as all get out to people at the kingdom hall but turns into satan as soon as she gets home.

  On another website, I read a thread that said life is mostly a scam and I couldn't agree more. We are mostly here to make richer people even richer.