What made you stay "in" even when you knew it wasn't the "truth"?

by mentalclarity 70 Replies latest jw experiences

  • mentalclarity

    Wow- so many great comments!

    @scratchme110 sounds like you were wise to the whole "it's the truth" thing from the get go.

    @tor1500 I never thought of lack of accountability because it's all the organization's fault as a reason. Makes sense. I also think it's mental laziness- no need to think for yourself.

    @pale.emperor- yes! I thought it was a lovely place until I realized it wasn't so lovely. I remember one time someone in my congregation wanted to use my house to throw a baby shower for a young witness girl who had gotten pregnant as was publicly reproved. I was like..of course! Let's help her out. The elders told her it was a bad idea (because she was reproved) so they ended up having something super small with just family at her house. I just thought to myself- this isn't right. That is so unloving....

  • DesirousOfChange

    Once my "doubts" about The Troof turned into "realities" and I knew it was all bullshit, I walked on it, but quietly. We didn't rock the boat, we didn't make a scene. We just fell off the radar. Stumbled, weak, and inactive we are.

  • Giordano

    .......and this really happened to me.

    Its the 1960's....... my wife and I are pioneering in N.W. Pennsylvania where the need was great. I am out by myself making back calls in town ..........it's a hot summer day. I am wearing a suit, carrying my briefcase, I'm sweating and irritated.......my collar is too tight.

    Our Main street is also part of the Route 6 corridor. I am standing on the corner when I hear a low growl and a rumble.......... I look South and see a number of motorcycles approaching. The closer they get I see that it's one of those Hell's Angels type motorcycle gangs.

    Everyone is in leathers of one sort or another...just about every one of the men has a woman riding with them. The men are bare chested with open leather vests the women sport leather bras and leather vests closed with very loosely tied laces. Did I mention there was a lot of skin on display.....

    The air is filled with the smell of sun screen lotion as everyone is lathered up. The lotion even makes makes their tattoos glow.

    At that moment all of the women looked beautiful and the men road straight and strong.

    And then I heard a song being played from their motorcycle radios(we only had one radio station in town).

    And it was the Rolling Stones "I can't get no satisfaction."

    And I stood there in my suit watching those riders slowly disappear down Main Street...envious of their freedom and new adventures.

    Humming 'I can't get no satisfaction' and never had a song so brutally described my exact feelings in that moment.

    The door had just swung open........ just enough to glimpse a different landscape.

  • mentalclarity

    @Giordano that's a wonderful depiction of freedom.

  • Phizzy

    I was brought up to be a lover of truth by my parents.Sadly they were JW's when I was born.

    As soon as I realised that the foundation Doctrine of "1914" was simply not in the Bible I stopped a lifetime of going Door to Door. When I had a "shepherding" call to find out why I, a well known preacher, had stopped, I explained that I could not teach what was not in the Bible. The Elder promised to return and prove to me that 1914 was correct. He never did.

    I left a few months later. So I did not stay once I knew it was not the truth, I could not, my conscience would not let me.

    I too feared the loss of family, I feared the loss of my beloved wife, I feared the loss of all my "friends". But I had a conscience that was not controlled or formed by the JW Org. I am not sure how that happened.

    99.9% of JW's have no moral compass of their own, it is dictated and formed by the JW Org, which is what keeps them entrapped.

  • millie210

    Love that Giordano

  • freddo

    You've posted that before Giordano - in another thread.

    I'm glad you posted it again.

    It's brilliant.

  • Giordano

    Thanks guys.

    Freddo I figure we have so many new ones showing up that you can repeat something every now and then lol.

    I kind of went sideways on the original question so here is my answer.

    So why did we stay in for about two more years?

    1. We just didn't have information about the Society's history.

    2. We didn't know about constant flip flops.

    3. We did not realize that corporate dogma was part of the belief structure.

    4. That they were reckless with the welfare of their followers.

    5. That some of their beliefs were killing innocent people (Blood Ban, Transplants etc.)

    But I did read The True Believer at age 16 and afterwards never Trusted the Society.

    Here's a gem by Eric Hoffer: Understand he wasn't talking about the WTBTS, never mentioned them in his book.....but that shoe fits.

    Not only does a mass movement depict the present as mean and miserable - it deliberately makes it so. It fashions a pattern of individual existence that is dour, hard, repressive and dull. It decries pleasures and comforts and extols the rigorous life. It views ordinary enjoyment as trivial or even discreditable, and represents the pursuit of personal happiness as immoral.

    This fit the Society. I guess we stayed on for a bit longer because we served the JW Community.

  • LongHairGal


    I knew it wasn't the "truth" in 1995 when they sprang that changed teaching on Generation on everybody. They didn't even have the balls to highlight they were changing a major teaching. They just slipped it into the magazine article and when you read it you felt like you got sucker punched.

    Yeah, I knew it was over at that moment in the Kingdom Hall. Why did I not get up and spit on the rug and run out of there? I guess I was stunned and trying to talk myself out of how I felt. But, as time went on and the reality set in, I went on the Internet and did research. I started to plan my "fade". I attended fewer meetings.

    I had other issues with the religion: their unacceptable attitude towards women and especially single women; their insane mentality against careers and full-time work. I let their foolish garbage go in one ear and out the other.

    I hung on for a while (a few more years) because I had friends there...However, the moment came when I had a death in the family and that's when I stopped.

  • mentalclarity

    @LongHairGal - Thanks for sharing your experience! I remember being at the meeting during that watchtower study. I don't think I fully comprehended what it meant until a bit later.

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