Dansk, where art thou ?

by Hamas 54 Replies latest jw friends

  • Mulan
    Mulan
    I'll throw in one more point, a "militant" exjw who wants to bring down the Watchtower will never help a "poor desperate soul", did one help you? I find these "militants" to be very destructive myself, I was helped by your everyday normal exjw who was more interested in helping me than in getting at the Watchtower through me.

    This is a very good point. I know when we were loyal JW's, I would never have listened to a militant ex JW. In fact I would have thought they were crackpots, insane, or both.

    We actually found our own way out, much the way you did, Dansk, but without the internet, which we didn't have back in 1995. Two years ago, I was directed to this site, after posting on the old H2O site, and found a wealth of support for all my feelings.

    I never looked on this board as a support group to help bring down the WTS. I am one of those who feel that will never happen. They may fragment, or turn into something more mainstream, but it is here to stay I fear.

    We have some very close friends, who have a situation similar to yours, Dansk. Their eldest daughter, only grandchild and son in law will have no contact with them. They have been out of the JW's for 3 years, and haven't seen their only grandchild since she was about 15 months old. Their other daughter left the "truth" with them, and is their only family connection. They got involved, trying to help a cause that they were sure would bring down the organization, or at least make their other daughter see what it for what it is. The Dateline TV show really raised their hopes, but nothing has changed.

    I believe you need to focus on what you have (your sons), and not stress over what you lost (your daughters). By living well, and having a happy life, you may do more good than trying to be an ex JW activist, and possibly causing your daughters to think you have lost your mind.

    I am so glad you are back.

  • Dansk
    Dansk
    Remember Dansk, while the WTS may strike you as the most obnoxious religion on the planet, it is rather benign compared to many that have not affected you personally.

    Of course - no other religion has taken my daughters!

    Hillary, my wife and I are not DA'd or DF'd, either - but we're still shunned. It's very difficult to be the politician when one is not allowed to voice an opinion. Then again, I suppose I could always shout across the street.

    Dansk

  • Brummie
    Brummie
    I suppose I could always shout across the street.

    Get your militant friend to shout with you and both of you can waste a couple of more hours together.

    Brummie

  • Dansk
    Dansk

    Hi Mulan,

    We have some very close friends, who have a situation similar to yours, Dansk. Their eldest daughter, only grandchild and son in law will have no contact with them. They have been out of the JW's for 3 years, and haven't seen their only grandchild since she was about 15 months old. Their other daughter left the "truth" with them, and is their only family connection. They got involved, trying to help a cause that they were sure would bring down the organization, or at least make their other daughter see what it for what it is. The Dateline TV show really raised their hopes, but nothing has changed.

    The father, BB, is my friend, also! BB helped me more than he'll ever know - and all the way from across the pond. I was hoping to get down to see him, his wife and "other daughter" next year but, unfortunately, that's looking increasingly unlikely. Next time you speak to him please tell him I asked how he was. I telephoned him a week or two back but got a recorded message. Guess I owe him another call.

    Dansk

  • onacruse
    onacruse

    Dear Dansk, I understand your frustration. Oh, how we would love to participate in a stone-that-slew-the-giant campaign

    HS hits the nail on the head: look at the ground. imo the demise, or at least the diminishment, of the WTS is going to come from the bottom up, and in fact is already happening. There is a fundamental social dynamic at work, characteristic of every "true believer" group that's ever existed. All the screaming and hollering of the GB will not prevent this "adjustment," and all our screaming and hollering will not accelerate it.

    That's why I focus on the individual, doing whatever little I can to support those who have left, are leaving, or are even just thinking of leaving the WTS. I've had the joy of helping some folks via this DB, and by other means that I can't openly discuss. Let me just say that, in my own small way, I've done enough "damage" to the WTS in the last year to make me sleep very well. It's a war of attrition, and the WTS is losing.

    Hang in there, friend.

    Craig

  • Dansk
    Dansk

    Brummie,

    I did put 'militant' in inverted commas, the point being to emphasise that he is not militant in the accepted term but that his ways are different to, shall we say, the norm. He is a swell guy known by quite a number on this list, though he doesn't post here. He has done much to expose Watchtower over the years and I am proud to be associated with him.

    Dansk

  • minimus
    minimus

    I'll bet that the methods Hillary and his wife use are very different from the ones that Dansk and his wife use. If a person is to have any effect upon those in the Watchtower, they need to be prepared to know HOW to express themselves. Shouting the errors of the Watchtower is not the way most get out of the "truth". We have to remember who we're trying to influence. It's persons that have been "brainwashed" into believing that anyone that publicly and vehemently goes against the "truth" is an apostate to be shunned. Any potential audience is gone if the tactics used are "shouting across the street". I think that the majority of persons that MIGHT even consider leaving the organization are ones that are slowly and carefully de-programmed.

  • cruzanheart
    cruzanheart

    I greatly admire everyone's efforts on this board, whether they are attempting to be global groundbreakers or do personal makeovers. Each of us in our own way have something to contribute. I'm extremely pleased to see how many newbies we've had join the forum just this month. That tells me that word is getting out that JWs have a place to go when they have doubts and questions. I am hoping that the talk at the convention about the Big Bad Internet drives more people here.

    You can't physically drag people out of an organization. They have to want to leave. That's the beauty of having free will. We choose our own path. We can lead by example. When it is legally appropriate, lawsuits can be filed to expose the organization's criminal activity which may or may not bring down the whole structure. But even if it continues -- and it might just do so, because there will always be some misguided fool who will like the message and ignore the fallacies -- the Borg loses every time someone leaves.

    Nina

  • Englishman
    Englishman

    You came into the witness religion by being drip-fed over a period of time.

    You leave via the same route.

    Englishman.

  • Dansk
    Dansk
    I'll bet that the methods Hillary and his wife use are very different from the ones that Dansk and his wife use.

    Min,

    We don't have ANY methods! We can't speak to any JWs openly because we're shunned. The two we have spoken to of late came round to us. It was then merely a matter of talking about what they already knew. Just knowing they could speak freely helped them.

    As for shouting, that's not my style - unless you've been naughty!

    I was rather hoping someone would pick up on an alternative way of attracting JWs other than the internet, i.e. for those without access. Any ideas?

    Dansk

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