Help Elders poking nose in

by Formerbrother 51 Replies latest jw friends

  • Formerbrother
    Formerbrother

    What can I do when Elders want to poke their nose in?

    They want to have another chat with me and my wife, but we dont want to, it just gets us down.

  • stillin
    stillin

    I just kind of say, "Thanks for the offer but I think that we are really beyond help." That's more in the context of them trying to be marriage counselors, but it should work when they want to remind you of Bible principles that you already know, too.

  • punkofnice
    punkofnice

    It depends how far you are prepared to go with this.

    Either constantly tell them 'thanks but no thanks' - or - get a solicitor to send a 'cease and desist' letter.

  • tiki
    tiki

    You have no obligation to answer to another human being regarding your personal life or decisions. If they want to meet and you do not simply say no thank you. And you need not give reasons behind your decision. It is none of their business.

  • Formerbrother
    Formerbrother

    Well they say they want to help and protect the congregation

    I dont want any trouble

  • Formerbrother
    Formerbrother

    Im happy to talk with them, but they want to talk to me and my wife together.

    They say they need my permission to talk to my wife, Im not sure, as I dont want to upset her

  • Formerbrother
    Formerbrother

    All I want is for them to leave us alone, they keep saying they want to help, I wish there was a polite way to say the best way to help is to leave us alone

  • careful
    careful

    "they want to help and protect the congregation"

    This means that you have already been marked for judicial action for the worst of sins, "apostasy." They seem interested in "saving" your wife or at least trying to determine if she also requires a JC.

    The wisest course is probably just to avoid them. If you can't do that, then you must take refuge in the "I have doubts" course. That's officially acceptable, that is, not a DFable offense. The best course is, in the long term, to avoid being DFed or DAed. It will lead to greater possibilities and freedoms for you. If you get DFed or DAed, it will close multiple doors for you in the future.

    Also you should not talk about your doubts/research with loyal Witnesses. That will lead to trouble for you.

    If you really want to be left alone, this is the best course.

  • _Morpheus
    _Morpheus
    All I want is for them to leave us alone, they keep saying they want to help, I wish there was a polite way to say the best way to help is to leave us alone

    There is... “the best way to help is to leave us alone”. See? Thats as polite as possible when someone is aggressively hounding you after being asked to stop. Freedom isnt free. Being mildly assertive is a small price. Just tell them to leave you alone. Its really that simple.

  • Drearyweather
    Drearyweather
    What can I do when Elders want to poke their nose in?

    I know that sad. But you gave them the authority to poke their nose in when you got baptized.

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