I'm getting disfellowshipped

by Letty 45 Replies latest jw experiences


    You get kicked out of the house - make sure to Publicize that 'loving act' of your parents and the JW all over the world !

    Make your folks famous !

    Involve an Attorney - JW hates the threat of litigation !

  • scratchme1010
    Hi everyone I'm 19 year old and I've been a jehovahs witness for 3 years now. I've followed the rules and I'm even a pioneer. But I've hid the secret of a boyfriend I had from india. My parents found out, as well as found some explicit messages and they are going to tell the elders. I'm so scared I don't know what to do. I gave everything to this religion and I'm about to lose it all. I'm so scared.

    Sorry you're going through that. You don't give a lot of details, so I won't comment on your particular situation. If you still have faith in your Jehovah, I'm sure that he will let happen what is best for you. If you don't believe in your Jehovah anymore, I'd suggest to start looking for support in places like this.


  • Stirred

    So sorry for the anxiety you are going through. Not being authentic is stressful and also living with others who pressure us to live inauthentically or fear judgment and rejection.

    Regarding some housekeeping matters - obtain your SSN card, key papers - diplomas, identification, insurance information, research your states/ city's resources for homeless/ youth.

    Here's a good article about the subject on Reddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/TheGirlSurvivalGuide/comments/1wciql/im_getting_kicked_out_what_do_i_need_to_know_to/

    Stay positive. Don't turn bitter. Shower all with kindness and decide now what moral principals and standards you will keep as an adult going forward and then be open and honest with them. You are worthy of dignity and respect even if you hid a boyfriend. You can acknowledge the truth about how your actions may have been less than honest and hypocritical. You can also decide what your new position will be going forward.

    Wishing you speed in landing on your feet and to finding the best bath for your highest good.

  • blownaway

    Anyone feel like you are being trolled?

  • no-zombie

    Hi blownaway,

    You know, I never worry about trolls because every thread I start or post I make, comes out of the genuine concern I have about a subject or a person. And if by chance, the person at the other end is just playing with me, then they are the real looser, having to lie or be deceitful just to wind me up. Yep ... I might get upset for a few minutes or so, but at the day ... I know which one of us is a decent human being. Or at least trying to be one.

    no zombie

  • punkofnice

    Tell them nothing happened. there was no sex, no kissing. just a passing flirtation. Were there 2 witnesses to anything apart from some messages on a phone? I think not.

    If no one saw anything then DENY DENY DENY. Unless you already 'fessed up.

    You'll get there. Everything changes. Nothing remains the same.

  • Letty

    I'm trying to be optimistic.but I'm in such a dark place. I used to be able to imagine my future but I literally can't see my future right now. I feel nothing. Where is god.

  • jookbeard

    Letty you dont seem to be paying much attention to the advice here, unless there are two witnesses to any so called sexual activity between you and your boyfriend this is very easy not to get DF'ed.

  • Letty
    The thing is a huge part of me wants to go. You guys have given me great advice. But I have a feeling I won't fight to stay. And the thing that's eating me alive is I'm scared to lose my family forever
  • Letty

    I guess I'll see what the elders decide. If I get disfellowshipped I'll go move in with my aunt. I'll be okay like you all said I need to calm down. I need to think rationally. Especially if I may be on my own.I'm sorry if I've been irrational, I'm just afraid.but I just need to breathe and think and use the advice you all gave me Thank you all. .

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