Give A Sample Of What a Watchtower Magazine Will Say 10 Years From Now

by minimus 48 Replies latest jw friends

  • ADubsFriend

    I am really hoping that in 10 years or less this will be the one and only headline:

    "Due To Lack Of Interest, We Are Kissing Our Ass Goodbye"

  • Nosferatu

    This is my first question, will the WTBTS be around 10 years from now?

    Now, onto the quotes!!

    What a Witness indeed!

    We're living in the last days

    ...a total of 19 baptisms worldwide this year!

    What a happy prospect!

    Jehovah's people are to abandon all worldly technology. This includes the internet, television, radio, automobiles, refridgerators. We are not Amish because Jesus advised us in the scriptures that beards are unclean.

    We're living in the days of Armageddon!

  • undercover

    9-15-13 WT "Keeping Awake at This Time of the End"

    We are living in the last days. Bible prophecy is being fulfilled in our very life time. Are we alert and awaiting for Jehovah's final judgement against this old world? Many of our faithful brothers are staying awake at this time of the end and are helping to spread the good news of the kingdom. But, unfortunately, many have let Satan the Devil and this old world of his distract them from our life saving work. Earlier this year we noted that, "many were distracted when the generation that saw 1914 passed completely away from the earth without Armageddon happening." Some of our dear brothers have commented that they believed this based on what they had read in the publications from the Watchtower Bible & Tract Society. While it is true that in times past the brothers have looked to certain time periods, hoping for the end of this wicked system, it has always been cautioned that man does "not know the day or hour". When we said in this magazine, "Many brothers took this to mean that generation meant in the lifetime of those living then..." we assuredly included ourselves in this expectation. While it may not have happened as man sees it should, this does not mean that God's timetable has changed. What should we do so as not to get caught up in date setting and unfulfilled expectations? Look to God's Organization through the teachings as brought to you on these pages by the Faithful and Discreet Slave. We can be assured that what Jehovah promises will come true and one can only learn about these promises through his modern day chosen prophet. One such way of learning these prophecies is to use our new publication, "The True Word of God as Know Only By His Modern Prophets". This 192 page, easy to read, 4 color photographed book is now available by attending one of the Kingdom Halls of Jehovah's Witnesses, providing them with your name, home phone number, address, email address and social security number. It will then be brought to you in person by one of our volunteer ministers along with one of our specially taught leaders from our new teaching arrangement class, The Pharisees.

  • shamus


    (Due to 400 judgments against us because of sexual abuse, we are forced to start charging $100.00 per copy... we hope that you understand...)

    This weeks edition....

    Why are elders such liars?

    The governing body.... in jail....

    Pray for us because we suck.....

    Why we are such hypocrites....

  • LyinEyes


  • ChrisVance

    Thanks everybody for you insightful postings. I laughed out loud several time. Youall made my day.


    These are our final copies/issues.

    We're out of business and out of publishers.

  • La Capra
    La Capra

    I have no idea when the 100th anniversary of the Watchtower, Bible and Tract Society was/is, but you can bet it WON'T be acknowledging or celebrating that. Tee Hee. Shoshana

  • Blueblades

    Because so many people have caught us in a lie,we are forced to change our magazines titles to The PLAIN TRUTH # 1 and THE PLAIN TRUTH # 2, because that other organization said they no longer are using these titles for their magazine,they admitted that they lied

    .Because we are not liars and you confuse what we say in the Watchtower and Awake,we can't make it any plainer to you than by changes our titled to THE PLAIN TRUTH.

    Everything we print in the plain truth magazine is nothing but the truth,so help us God.! Now how many subscriptions did you say you wanted,MR.Armstrong?


  • Reborn2002

    Same ole BS, different day.

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