by Phoebe 58 Replies latest jw friends
Welcome to the forum, Phoebe. You will find much encouragement and support here. Keep your eyes and ears open......................there is a lot to learn from many of the posters here. You have chosen a beautiful name for yourself: Phoebe. It is from Greek origin and means 'bright, shining one'. May your future now be 'bright' and happy!
Hi never a jw,
My husband has only just recently found JWSurvey but he's been telling me there's something wrong with it for years. Then, not too long ago, he said he'd discovered, and been listening to, John Cedars and I must admit I was quite alarmed and told him he mustn't go on apostate web sites. But he kept telling me about JWSurvey and Critical Thinker and the things he was telling me made sense so I...reluctantly....had a peek.
I was terrified to look. But then I realised that these people weren't monsters, they were decent human beings trying to help. So the more I looked the more I wanted to know and John Cedars said 'research, research, research' so I did.
Thank you, sparky 1.
I spent quite awhile choosing a name!
Hi Phoebe,
I just popped in here and your intro caught my attention, so please may I add my voice to this thread of lovely welcomes and encouragements.
I'm 60 years old and wearily said 'NO!' to all that Watchtower 'stuff' three to for years ago. We walked through some seriously painful days, as you can understand.
I started this post with the words 'popped in' as I haven't contributed here for awhile - slowly but surely life has taken on a new breath of its own and I can actually be happy and at peace with myself and with God....living apart from all the WT chaos and the hurt that goes with it.
Yes, I keep faith, stronger than ever, yet totally understand why many don't after the manipulative and dishonest faith bending tactics of the WT.
Like others here, I want to send you words of support. You are not alone here.
Keep brave dear.
Love Alive x
i was baptised 54 years ago.
Thank you Alive , for your lovely kind words. xxxxx
Stan livedeath
54 Years? that's amazing. xx
Welcome Pheobe, you've come to the right place. So sorry to hear about the tragedies in your life. It takes time but you will fully heal. The hardest part for me was the knowledge that I didn't have the answers anymore and that there really are no answers.....that was tough. But I got through it and realized that what is truly important was to be a great person and to love others and to live each day to the fullest. We are all going to die unfortunately, and that's hard to accept but once you do it's easier to live each day with new vigor.
Stan livedeath
54 Years? that's amazing. xx
but i resigned 45 years ago...LOL.
Welcome, Phoebe! Your story moved me so much. Like you, I was "born in". I was baptized a few days after I turned 12. (Jan.1964 ) My family on both sides were part of this toxic organization since about 1900
My father was a "Colporter", a "Special Pioneer", a "Congregation Servant" (PO/COBE before the elder arrangement) and an abusive alcoholic. Like you, my first memory is being terrified, In my case, I was about 3 yo, uncontrollably sobbing during the dark car ride home from the KH where I had wiggled in my seat. My father had pointed his finger at me and whispered you're going to "get it" when we get home! I knew the beating with his belt that awaited me. My mother was silent as he would shout, "hush up or the beating will be worse". I also remember crouching in my room praying for Jehovah to help me when the fighting between my parents was unbearable.
It's not that other unfortunate children haven't experienced these difficulties, it's that this horrible home life is compounded by having to be JW in school. The weirdo who isn't allowed to be like the other kids because GOD HATES everybody and everything that isn't JW. A child should not have to be afraid of abuse and abandonment. I too, have PTSD. Isn't it ironic that an organization which attracts/causes so much pathology strongly discourages therapy? What are they afraid we will discover? Could it be they want us to remain terrified, compliant, and gullible?
Congratulations on your hubby and children being out. At least you don't have them shunning you! Congratulations too, on finding this site. I know the people and ideas here will be of great support and comfort to you. Keep reading, posting, and be assured of our love.
Welcome! Glad you found your way here. Let the healing begin!
