Urban Legends!

by ISP 56 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Englishman

  I heard about a Brother Heanes in Portsmouth. Bro. Heanes was doing a return visit and was confronted by a large German shepherd dog barking at the front gate.

  He eventually plucked up courage and gently opened the gate to find that the dog was quite friendly, so he knocked on the door and the householder invited him in.

  The dog lay at his feet, Bro. Heanes was doing his stuff when the dog cocked it's leg and urinated against the wall.

  The householder didn't seem bothered and eventually the Bro called it a day and went to leave.

  As he walked down the path, the householder called out: "Mister Heanes! Don't forget to take your dog with you!"

  Englishman.
• 

  wheelwithinwheel

  Another assembly lesson-legend from the wild land of Africa:

  The country was experiencing serious problems with rebel groups. Rumor had it that the rebels were in the area. So a brother decides not to go to the meeting and stand guard in front of his house with a spear. The rebels arrive in front of his house. He tells them he is one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. They reply that witnesses don’t bear arms and that they happen to know that all the J.W’s in the area are at their religious meeting. They kill the brother.

  Principals we must apply :

  don’t put worldly possessions above your meetings
  don’t use arms to defend yourselves
  don’t miss meetings

  I guess it was a converted rebel who related the conversation
• 

  goo

  hi englishman - i enjoy your posts - i honestly didnt get the one above though? the dog story - goo.
• 

  goo

  wheel:

  Principals we must apply :

  don’t put worldly possessions above your meetings
  don’t use arms to defend yourselves
  don’t miss meetings

  don't become a jw

  goo.
• 

  Englishman

  Goo,

  Bro Heanes thought that the dog was the householders, he thought it was Bro heanes dog.The dog was a stray.

  englishman.
• 

  anglise

  Hi Philo
  I remember David Carter.
  Didnt he used to call the sisters 'petal and flower' or similar.
  I remember once at the back of the platform at the assembly during the singing of the song he started messing about by conducting all of us standing there and then walked round and listened with his head close to each one as we were trying to sing this song.
  I cant remember if it was the same day but after one of the assemblies within about 10 mins of the final prayer he came down to the laundry room with a bag full of dirty clothes (he was dressed very casually now) and put them into wash without even speaking to us who were working there.
  I think he was teamed up with Clive Upton as his CO, chalk and cheese.
  At this same venue I remember the UL about the PIO sister and interested male (book bag into water) and the angel standing behind 2 sisters.
• 

  goo

  englishman - me duh!!!! thanks goo.
• 

  wheelwithinwheel

  goo

  don't become a jw

  now why didn't the speaker mention that one? Some might've listened

  W
• 

  Mommie Dark

  I wonder if Geoff is still following this thread?

  I sometimes get mad a ME for still being capable of amazement at this JW superstition and fear of demons inhabiting objects. When am I going to cease to be surprised at the depths of moronitude to which sheepism can lead?
• 

  rodnico

  Mommy-
  Nope sorry, I was raised in Utah. That is where I heard the story, but the person come to think of it, that told me the story was just visiting Bethel.
  Rodnico