Do You Have A Negative Outlook Because You Were Once A JW?

by minimus 38 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  The Bethelite

  I think Chris Taylor said it perfectly in the last lines from the movie platoon.

  "I think now, looking back, we did not fight the enemy, we fought ourselves, and the enemy was in us. The war is over for me now, but it will always be there, the rest of my days. As I'm sure Franz will be, fighting with Knorr for what Rhah calls "possession of my soul." There are times since, I've felt like a child, born of those two fathers. But be that as it may, those who did make it have an obligation to build again. To teach to others what we know, and to try with whats left of our lives to find a goodness and a meaning to this life."
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  minimus

  It’s so much better when we choose to enjoy life. Life is short let’s make the most of what we have left and not dwell on the past.
• 

  stan livedeath

  i have a positive mental attitude

  a glass half full kind of guy

  hey--no--its empty! cant have that--back in a minute.
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  blondie

  No point in grieving over the past. I'm just glad to have been out for the last 20 years. It is only too late when you are dead, some person said. I can discuss my experiences and research the WTS teachings without triggering a sad return to the past. It keeps me aware of the good reasons why I left. I have a positive view of myself and my future. Any problems I have now are easier to deal with, without the lala land view of the WTS.
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  OnTheWayOut

  "...we have a lot of baggage because we are a bit messed up..."
  
  Yes sir.
• 

  Humphry

  Min

  It’s so much better when we choose to enjoy life. Life is short let’s make the most of what we have left and not dwell on the past.

  Being in the now, and living in harmony with the Tao. Is a way to accept reality and live in harmony with what is without any mental resistance. I prefer to call it being more whole or at peace with one's self and enjoying the life you have left. It's my ideal to which I strive. Being in the moment cannot be permanent and is lost when lots of activity is happening in the brains DMN ( Ego,)(default mode network) is active(not being in the now). Being in the now and having one's DMN activity lessened the whole brain lights up because this network acts as a restrictor valve on brain activity the more active it gets. This is all on FMRI scans:

  
  
  
• 

  minimus

  Nirvana
• 

  Humphry

  I think this is a good place to post this. This guy has some good ideas about spiritual seeking and addiction. A getting to know our true self and the lessening of our compulsive/addictive behavior.

  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AjuwOf1_63g
  
• 

  ThinkerBelle

  Short answer - No, but I've never been a negative person.

  IMO, I see more negativity in the JWs than anyone in my worldly life, especially from parents. I do get those pangs of guilt of having stayed with the religion so long when celebrating with my kids as Baihi mentioned. My eldest kids were partially raised in it for several years and I regret not having those memories with them as young kids as well as not celebrating with family that are not JW (several members being gone now). I also look back on sone relationships and how I would have treated then differently haf I known what I know now, but Ce la vie. I live in the now and make the most of everything so there is no room for negative thinking.
• 

  StephaneLaliberte

  Once you realize that no one is normal, you realize you're actually not so bad.

  Even if this statement was true, it does not dismiss the harm caused by the watchtower.

  Had it not been for WT teachings, I am convinced I would have followed a different career. I would have made some real friends and would have come across better opportunities than what I have now. I also would’ve had better exposure to the world around me through various activities such as extra scholar activities and sports clubs.

  When I look back at my years within the cult, I encountered “normal” struggles: parents divorced, death of loved ones, bullying at school, unemployment, etc. But that cult made everything worse. And places I was supposed to draw comfort from were in fact doing the opposite. I was surrounded by shallow friends while I was expected to shun the ones I loved. I was continually shamed for various reasons including feeling prideful for not accepting some of the teachings. While I now enjoy reading books and various activities, I was shamed into dedicating most of my extra time to the church.