Here we go again - I think I'm toast this time

by DanTheMan 47 Replies latest jw friends

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  refiners fire

  ..."The incident back from November and this incident involve two different coworkers"...

  Hey Dan. It might comfort you to know that I was in trouble at work over unwanted attention two two seperate women at my job a few years back. I ended up not getting sacked for it, but they DID formally issue me an absolute warning and said if it happened a third time I was out.

  So there you go. I was talking to a girl at work once who was upset and crying, things started FEELING all intimate ,to me , and I told her I found her very attractive. Big mistake, she flipped out. Sometimes, as a man, I can feel that there is a mutual vibration of attraction there, but it isnt there in reality. Its all one sided. My side. So I trod more carefully in future brother.
• 

  DanTheMan

  Sometimes, as a man, I can feel that there is a mutual vibration of attraction there, but it isnt there in reality

  You said it all right there bro. I have had several incidents in my life where I thought I read interest in a woman's expressions, body language, eye contact, only to find out that I was totally wrong. I don't read women well.
• 

  refiners fire

  I think that going in all deadly serious and telling a girl you find her terribly attractive is definitely NOT a winning tactic. I never succeeded using that approach with a relatively strange girl . I know this girl is no stranger, and you mustnt forget, the girls at work do TALK, among themselves. The word gets around about what you do in the girls lunch room,and they look at you and think "Stalker". So they are edgy around you.If you scratch your butt in front of one your liable to be accused of making "suggestive signs". Im not having a go at you man, Cause it happened to me too. Id give that "intense" approach away Dan. Try developing a bit of humour. Smiling like you are joking when you say things allows you to get away with a lot. (I know Ive got a lot to say in this thread, and I apologize, but Ive been where you are.)
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  nativenyr23

  Dan:

  Although i don't know the entire situation, this chickie sounds like she may be "leftover" hypersensitive possibly? STAY AWAY....she's trouble for ya, dude. Because that conversation (if you interpreted it correctly) was fairly innocent. It makes it really hard for people who've actually had serious harrassment prove their point with frivolities such as this one. (p.s. i'd start documenting all interactions with this co-worker, THIS INCLUDES EMAILS).
  Native
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  DanTheMan

  Hey RF you can post to my thread all you want, I appreciate your input & empathy bro. Funny that you mentioned the word "intense" - this is a word that people have used to describe me many times (as in, Dan girls just find you to be too intense dude!). But you know, asking me not to be an intense person is like asking a real laid-back, easygoing person to become more serious and rigid. I yam what I yam! (That's a Popeye reference, in case you're not familiar with the cartoon. Do you have cartoons in Australia? )

  nativeyr23 - If I am allowed to return to work, I am never going to speak to or look at this girl again, so I don't think there are any worries there. She has already moved up into the top 5 of my list of people that I wish I'd never met.
• 

  animal

  I get vibes from those that are fun, and those that are not. I avoid the non-fun ones, I am only in it for the fun anyhows. They are usually men haters anyhow.

  I remember the days when my female coworkers would come to work on mondays and tell us all about thier sexual escipades. What fun.

  Animal
• 

  berylblue

  Once again I'm feeling like a total waste of flesh. Any encouragement would be nice right now.

  I wasn't there, so I don't know what will happen. But I can assure you this: YOU ARE NOT A TOTAL WASTE OF FLESH.

  You know, there is a man at work who comes right out and tells me how much he wants to uh, bed me. He talks about threesomes and about how he'd love to do this and that to me. honest, I'm not lying....I just ignore him. I would never dream of reporting him. It's not even offensive, just too utterly declasse' for words.

  I truly don't understand some women.

  As a matter of fact, when I was an HR manager, one of my "associates" pinned me up against the wall, and started to tear my clothes off. I never ratted him out....he had four children. I didn't have the heart. I just stayed the hell away from him.

  It does not seem to me as though you did or said anything inappropriate.

  I don't know your situation, but if you grovel, then you really may feel like a total waste of flesh. Hold you head high and stick to your guns. Don't let that silly neurotic b**** get the best of you.

  Easy for me to say...I know. Not so easy to do. Just remember, you are worth so much more than this ludicrous situation or even your job!

  Beryl
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  DanTheMan

  Well, I'm not going to hear until Monday.

  As you can imagine, my mind is abuzz wondering what is going to happen and why the hell it is taking so long for them to make a decision.