nilfun,...........I do agree that everyone has their own experience. The abuse in my home had nothing to do with being JW's. I think the kind of people my folks were, made them susceptible to the mind control of that organization. Which is exactly my point. Abused people, dysfunctional people, etc., are attracted to that kind of a group.
As for my own choices and my brothers............as adults we chose it. We weren't forced by our parents to stay in it and move up in the organization. It always comes down to a choice.
If you weren't very involved in it, and I realize not all were as involved as my family was...........we NEVER missed meetings, and I mean NEVER. We always went in service on the weekends, sometimes both days. Mid week was part of it..........we had Bible studies, so we indoctrinated others too, then your experience was likely different than mine.
My brother and I both chose it. We were both baptized, and it was our idea. Our parents never suggested it to either of us. We both gave up our summers, as teenagers to pioneer. Again, no one told us we should, we just did it. We thought we were supposed to, because we were baptized. Mom worked and Dad was rarely home, so they couldn't have made us do it. We were both independent kids, and were raised that way. Mom was always proud of us because we were very industrious and took the initiative to do things ourselves. Dad was not very active as a JW, but Mom was very much so, and our whole family............grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, were very prominent. It truly was our lifestyle. Our culture perhaps. That is one reason it was so hard to walk away.
Mom told me once a few years ago, that she admired me for doing what I did. I was shocked!! Then she explained. "You could no more continue doing something you didn't wholeheartedly believe in than you could fly. You are just that kind of person. I know it was hard for you to make that decision." It still made her very sad, and still does.
Again, if you think you were coerced, you won't take responsibility for it having been your choice. You will always be able to say.........."it was forced on me". It took me a long time to come to that conclusion. A former elder, pointed it out to me, and even wrote a paper on it for me to read. He always told me that I would never get over the anger if I didn't admit my own role in my "brainwashing". He told me I was a willing victim and pointed out my own son who didn't conform. I eventually had to admit that he was right, and i could stop being so angry. I was really, really angry at my parents, at the organization, and at God, but never at myself.
