August KM Fall Out

by writerpen 40 Replies latest jw friends

  • writerpen

    I'm curious to know if anyone has noticed different behavior from their dub family and friends since the Aug. KM about disfellowshipped ones. I've noticed that my mother is no longer emailing me, nor is she responding to my emails. I really wish that she would just come out directly and state that she will no longer talk to me instead of just ignoring everything, thinking I will go away.

  • ozziepost

    Yes, I think so.

    We feel that our children are under enormous pressure to sever any connection AT ALL with their parents.

    Just this week, we're living in a kind of zombie world, as it were.

    I'm sure this has been made worse by the KM article.


  • proplog2

    I have talked to several very faithful JW's (former missionary - former HLC member - pioneer sister 20 years) and they all felt that the article sets the stage for fanatic witch-hunts.

    It will primarily affect baby-boom generation members who are Elders. Elders have some of the most rebellious kids because they have heard their fathers talk about all the garbage that goes on in the congregation. And because Elders play the time-consuming game of "Reaching Out" they have neglected their kids. A lot of Elders have disfellowshipped children. Contrary to some of the opinions on this board I believe Elder's kids are more likely to be disfellowshipped because there are usually other Elder's that want to Zap them to get even for some old arguments over KH remodeling project or thermostat settings.

    I predict a bigger reaction to this KM insert than to the whole Silent Lambs thing.

  • writerpen

    Thanks for your replies thus far. Interesting viewpoint proplog2. I've always believed that elders neglected their own children, thus the reason so many leave the organization. It will be interesting to see how everything turns out. I really think that some will wise up someday - like my parents who have had their heart strings yanked back and forth because of the asses in Brooklyn deciding one minute that it's okay to talk to df family and then reversing that decision later and so on. My parents have enjoyed the past few years of associating with my brother especially since he had their first grandbaby. I'm wondering what they think about having a much more difficult time avoiding him, but trying to see the baby.

  • larc

    My only contact to that world is my JW sister. I talk to her on the phone about every two weeks. Our last conversation was about two weeks ago and everything was fine between us. I think I am going to wait for about two months before I call her again, hoping that whatever effect the KM has on her will soften a little over time. I really thank those who brought the KM article to our attention.

  • witchywoman

    My daughter has come out and said that she can no longer have communications with me. After twelve years, we were on track. The progress that we have made over the last two years was destroyed by that one KM. I did not think that it would effect me as it has. I was going to wait a month, perhaps I should do as you larc and wait two.

    In any event I will not longer keep all of this inside as I have done in the past. If she does not come around I plan to be vocal to all of my relatives about her religion and what it has told her to do. Perhaps such a loving provision from Jehovah will move them to want to study the bible and embrace "the truth" wholeheartedly, and to see what a loving kind god Jehovah really is.


  • Mulan

    My mother insists there is no change. I have to admit I read the article carefully, and I don't see a change either.

    Is it a reminder because they had gotten lax on this subject?

    If anyone sees a change, tell me where it is, please. It is identical to a WT article from about 15-20 years ago.

  • writerpen

    Sorry to hear about your daughter witchywoman.

    I've decided that I'm no longer going to let my parents control our relationship, which ultimately means the the WTBS has control. Therefore, I'm no longer going to allow them to try and develop a relationship with me until they have left that damn organization. Here I had put a lot of hope into a possible relationship with them, since they were talking to me and even allowing me to come to their home. But since this KM, all hope has been lost until the asses in Brooklyn change their mind again, and open of the family lines of communication. Therefore, as stated before, until they leave that organization, never again will I allow a relationship to bud with them.

  • blondie

    Mulan, I think you are right in that there is no change. It is just that those articles, some written 20 years ago, have not been studied, read, or researched by many who have become JWs in the last few years. Then those who did read those articles have gotten lax, seeing how far they can stretch the envelope, many of them elders with DF'd children who have had their own children. The unofficial word behind the scenes is to play down elders associating with DF'd family. Unofficially, Brooklyn will not take action against these elders unless the elders flaunt it. The org is so short on elders now they can't afford to DF any.

  • writerpen

    Mulan, I think the change most likely lies in private instructions given to elders. I read somewhere that years after the WT article that you are referring to, the society sent private information to elders stating that ones could in fact have dealings with disfellowshipped family without being punished. However, from what I read, they were instructed to keep this new information confidential, however if they heard of family having contact with df family members, not to pursue the issue judicially as they had been instructed earlier. Therefore, with this reiteration in the KM, I would bet my ass that they have also sent private info to the elders stating that now they should judicially pursue those who do associate with df family.

    Anyone have further info on this or a correction to my understanding?

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