WOULD YOU BE AN ACTIVE WITNESS IF????

by minimus 49 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • minimus
    minimus

    Would you be an active Witness or even an inactive one if you could change a few things? For example: Let's say the blood issue could be resolved, would you stay? Or if 1914 doctrine was dissolved or the disfellowshipping/ shunning view changed?

  • LB
    LB

    I try not to go backwards, no matter what changes are promised. I tried that with a wife once.

  • Nathan Natas
    Nathan Natas

    Absolutely not.

    Adding sour cream to vomit doesn't make it party dip..

  • plmkrzy
    plmkrzy

    WOULD YOU BE AN ACTIVE WITNESS IF???? It came with a salary and full benifits that included Delta Full coverage. NO HMO's!

    OH and a retirement plan

  • sunstarr
    sunstarr

    I'd still be a witness if only they weren't so restrictive on the length of women's skirts. It just drove me away. Makes me so sad.

  • minimus
    minimus

    Sunstarr, NOW THAT'S funny.

  • OUTLAW
    OUTLAW

    ......NO!!!!!...... ...OUTLAW

  • larc
    larc

    If they had same ideas as the Unitarians, I would go back. I guess that is unlikely.

  • DazedAndConfused
    DazedAndConfused

    No, absolutely not! Do I come by that decision by random? No! Take for an example this quote from the WTS itself:

    Awake, October 8, 1968 (?) (If anyone sees that this comes from a different year, let me know)

    A time to Lift Up Your Head in CONFIDENT HOPE (Title of the article)

    The Difference (A couple of paragraphs into this "insightful article)

    True, there have been those in times past who predicted an end to the world, even announcing a specific date. Some have gathered groups of people with them and fled to the hills or withdrawn into their houses waiting for the end. Yet, nothing has happened. The end did not come. They were guilty of false prophesying. Why? What was missing?

    Missing was the full measure of evidence required in fulfillment of Bible prophecy. Missing from such people were Gods truths and the evidence that he was guiding and using them.

    Given time, I could come up with more quotes as to "predictions" gone wrong in this organisation. Many times they state the very same thing that they have done that proves an organisation as not being from God.

  • dedalus
    dedalus

    Conditions for my return:

    1) The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy replaces The Holy Scriptures as the religion's main text. The Bible may still be used, but only insofar as it supports Douglas Adams.

    2) All meetings are, of course, declared optional, although contributions are used to purchase quality imported beer for those who do decide to attend. A special play area is designated for children, who use the Society's old publications for paper mache and other art projects.

    3) Door-to-door is replaced with free time to do with as you wish.

    4) Conventions are held once every 2 and 1/2 years, so the novelty doesn't wear out so quickly. They are held in fine hotels, seminar-style, so attendees can choose which (if any) sessions to attend. Anyone caught wearing an attendant's badge will be stripped, smeared head-to-toe with honey, and thrown into a vat of angry red ants.

    5) Formerly disfellowshipped, disassociated, and inactive Witnesses are restored to "good standing" and then promoted to "Grand Pumba Witnesses" for a term equaling the duration of their exile from the Organization. During this time, they are waited on and pampered by their former congregations' bodies of elders, particularly those who served on any judicial committees related to their departure.

    6) The Organization reimburses all Witnesses for expenses incurred while distributing literature, funds the education of the children of those who didn't go to college because it was forbidden at the time, and cancels all loans owed them by local congregations.

    7) The sign atop Bethel headquarters is changed from "Read God's Word the Bible Daily" to either "Don't Panic" or "The Meaning of Life is 42".

    Dedalus

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