My jw mum threw us out.
Scary: Thank you.
bigmac: Who knows what my elder brother has planned? Apparently they are looking for a property in Pembrokeshire, on the Welsh border.
I would like to think he would choose a property with a sort of annexe to house our mother. But the signs are not good. He and his wife
regularly take their largish caravan (trailer) to the East Coast and have never taken my mother with them once. They are childless. He has
a real cruel streak. I told my younger brother some of his antics with me when I was small (not sexual) locking me up in the coal store
when my mum was out etc and he just said, thats child abuse. I only realised that last week. I'm glad today that Karl and me
are free of them both.
'Apparently they are looking for a property in Pembrokeshire, on the Welsh border'
No, Pembrokeshire is as far west as you can go - the furthest from the border.
Joe: oops. Geography not my strongest point. Is there another County beginning with P near Wales?
I feel so bad for all those who like myself have aged parents to have to deal with. Id say that you have been left no choice but to send her to a aged care home, shes a threat to your safety. and probably hers, as if she tries to strike someone with that cane she can fall or break a bone. no one should be abused by anyone no matter how old they are. no parent in thier right mind would want to see thier children grow up to be subjected to such a burden.
i hope your brother doesnt take it personally, nor you, but no matter its so hard on everyone involved. my heart goes out to you two.
My parents are age 73 and 75, they are both constantly critical of everyone, and crabby to the hilt. I get sick thinking about what I m going to do with my paarents, my younger brother and sister [not jws] and I are not in a position to care for them, we all have health issues and all three of us are in relationships with people who my parents critisize and are not comfortable with.
my sister spends the most time with my parents, and she sees how bad my parents mental state is.
shes so stressed about it shes beside herself as to what to do.
I myself have often thought that Id certainly be off the caretaker list the moment I send a letter to the elder body resigning from the jw faith.
would that be selfish? but id probaby not be so lucky my mother is a preaching pest, shed not let me go.
I have been a jw most of my life[age 5] and im 52 now. but now not being at meetings for about 7 months Im still off the radar.so i can pull the letter 'card' out If I wanted to. and at least for the time being my mother would have to 'listen' to the elders and not talk to me.
but honestly my mother and dad depend on me so much I doubt that shed follow protocol anyway shed find a way to use my father as a reason to have me helping them, shed say ' well my husband is not a baptised JW so if he calls her I cant do anyting about it'. she always used my dad this way. and yet claims shes such a christain. oh well, lol, who is huh?
my husband who is not a jw says my parents are not moving in with us no matter what. my mother wouldnt anyway, she feels uncomfortable around him to begin with. Id love for my parents to sighn a do not recusitate order to carry in thier wallet, for one thing my father has a badheart to begin with, and my mothers mind is already showing signs of alzheimers. I watched my grandmother with that desease, and i cant go through that.
I feel strongly the reason we have all these aged people living in misery is becasue the medical establishment keeps bringing them back to life whe n they should have passed on, so they can make millions off them.
and in the mean time they are destroying families, all the children whos parents are taking care of mentally disabled wheelchair ridden adults instead of spending joyfull days with thier children and grandchildren , makes me very angry.
that so many of us go from taking care of children, possible also working full time, straight to taking care of crabby ass parents or husbands or wives , and have never had a moment to do anything enjoyable for ourselves.
really then what point is life?
Sowhatnow: The elders in my mothers cong were all of the opinion that because I had DA'd and was not disfellowshipped
this allowed me access to care for her. I don't actually understand their thinking on this but wasn't going to argue
the point. Its all such a mess isn't it? How true that the 'thief has robbed, stolen and destroyed' our families.
I agree with Skeeter. Call the elder care folks, tell them what happened, that you are worried she is mentally ill but you can't go to check on her because she has been violent toward one of you -- actually beating him with her cane.
Hortensia: Karl would forgive her if she hit him over the head with an empty whisky bottle. However, I have to keep
him well away from the elder brother - there is dangerous animosity lurking although he goes out of his
way to be civil with him. I wouldn't want Karl to end up being arrested for GBH - he hasn't forgot the vile assault
on him 27 years ago. Our elder brother must now make all the decisions - he has all her bank books in his
possession - we will let him deal with it alone. We're out of there now.
Oh my. I just read your story. You and your bro need to stay strong with each other. Strength to you.