Marriage Consummation - emailed question has me stumped

by jwfacts 62 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  piztjw

  the fact that the marriage was not consumated me it does not count as a marriage.

  According to a circus oversneer I know, "as long as marriage vows were stated before witnesses it is a valid marriage regardless of whether it was consummated or not."

  So IF it is the marraige vows, and not the sexual act which constitutes making the two "one flesh", then not only I, but anyone else should be safe spending the night with another person, living with another of the opposite sex, or whatever...as long as we don't actually do the deed. After all we have not become one flesh via marriage vows, according to WT dogma.

  In reality though we all know it isn't logical, fair, or even half-ways consistent. It's all about making examples of the flock in whatever ways fits the agenda of the moment, or whatever axe the eldurrs have to grind with you at the moment. It's all about control!
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  AndDontCallMeShirley

  ironically, if the husband became an apostate, the Elders would without hesitation tell her she needs to leave him---to protect her "spirituality".

  .

  consummation, or lack of it, at the point would be moot, and the Elders would feel no hesitation with getting involved.

  .

  as Adamah said, "You cannot win in a kangaroo court..."
• 

  Finkelstein

  Might this guy lied about not having sex while married to his previous wife just that he could leverage that as a means

  for him to remarry ???

  The elders still have to go by the law of land which states a man can not legally get re-married until his

  previous marriage with legally divorced.

  Consummation has no relevance in legal terms.

  Perhaps the woman he had married didn't commit adultery so he couldn't divorce her and remarry,

  so he concocted a story of non-consummation.

  .
• 

  bigmac

  besty--love your comments --lol

  quelly--are you in the UK--?

  this hole ( ahem ) subject of marriage consummation--means what exactly--?--

  -is it purely sexual intercourse with the intent to cause pregnancy?

  or--what if a condom is used--or--anal / oral sex?

  as for annulment--what a farce---my girlfriend is philipina--divorced in the UK--but not in her home country.
• 

  konceptual99

  I wonder why a marriage cannot be dissolved if the State allows it, especially if no scriptural laws are broken? If your mate cheats and you re-consumate the marriage, that is considered forgiveness. The bond of " one flesh " was broken by the offender, and it was up to the non-offending mate to make that union again or not. So if that bond of "one flesh" never took place, then only thing left is a legal arrangement in the Country you live in. If the superior authorities allow it and you were never "one flesh", there should be no reason why the relationship cannot be dissolved. In essence you would have been dating without a chaperone for years if no sex to place.

  The Elders should just say, " We are not the masters over your faith."

  Brilliant bit of satire ;-)

  Seriously - when you think that the the God of the OT was OK with daughters shagging their old man, slave girls being thrown out to be gang raped, minimal sanctions for murdering a man to bag his missus, polygamy etc. then it's no wonder the modern day rules around marriage lack any common sense and, in the worst cases, fellow human feeling.
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  piztjw

  Husband cheats, wife is recommended by the elders to stay with him. She sleeps with him but can't bear it, but the elders say she showed forgiveness by sleeping with him so is no longer free to remarry

  In my case many years ago it was my ex-wife who cheated, repeatedly. I wanted nothing more to do with her, so followed all the BS rules the sheep shearers spouted out about not having sex blah, blah, blah. Then after only a couple weeks she went and bitched to them about me not having sex with her and said THAT was why she continued f--king around! I was the one who had their ass hauled before the tribunal for refusing the "marriage due"! She was not DF'd, I was! Some years later after I was RI'd I remarried, and both of us were promptly DF'd, because I had not as the , "innocent mate filed for the divorce, but rather she did." They claimed that as such I was not free as I had not been the one to file. Again, it's all about control and who they like! They make the rules up as they stumble along.
• 

  bigmac

  piztjw---you just couldnt make this stuff up.
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  piztjw

  piztjw---you just couldnt make this stuff up.

  Sadly...no.
• 

  galaxie

  perhaps the 'legal' marriage certificate should not be issued until proof of consummation has taken place. Now whos going to be "witness" to that... heh heh.
• 

  Band on the Run

  I find it hard to believe that a man would accept nonconsummation of a marriage. It makes me wonder if it is a valid marriage in the eyes of the state. I recall friends taking family law telling me some items a long time ago. Why is this only being discussed now? The story doesn't sound quite kosher. I confess that I read a lot of royal history and royal historical nonfiction. Princesses and princes marrying are so romantic to a young girl. When you read the reality, it is not romantic. There was often a decades difference in age and most times they met on the wedding day. Courtiers and officials used to sit in chairs and witness the consummation. Foreign and economic policy depended on consummation. The sheets were kept in case a divorce was needed later. I found out that Henry VIII was only monarch. Divorce did happen.

  They aren't married. The couple are roommates. Whatever the common law and modern law rules for marriage are today, the WT has no business. Of course, how many once consummated marriages turn into sexless arrangements. How do the elders find out all this info? There is dignity in keeping marital business within a marriage.