by DATA-DOG 64 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
If I was your child and I grew up and married and had children, I do not know if I would let you even be with my children. That is how heartless, what you said was.
Over one bad thing that was said? Really? Even if normally he was a very caring, loving father who made many, many sacrifices for his child?
Hopefully this too will pass and tomorrow will be a better day for you both.
That reminds me growing up with my father. He believed, like the Org taught, in top-down authority. His decisions could not be questioned. His faults could not be brought up. Such an upbringing killed my self-esteem.
DD- You sound like my spiritual mother.
Lol COBE beef!
Yeah datadog you stripped your kids self esteem with that comment. I know I have have said things that are hurtful myself.
I always TRY to look at parenting as trying to always carry my boys on my shoulders. Metaphorically speaking of course. I want to lift them up so that they become more than I am.
With remarks like the one you threw at your kid, is it any wonder that he has "attitude"?
Look at it another way. Suppose after saying that to your child, something awful happened, like him getting killed in a car accident. Are those really the last words you'd want him to hear from you?
Apologize.
You're the grown up. You're supposed to know better, and you're supposed to set the example for appropriate behaviour. Show him what that looks like so that he can learn from you.
Apologize.
It is obvious that after you said that to your son you must have felt bad about it or you wouldn't have ask for our opinions. I would apologize to him, a child needs to know you are sorry too when you make an error in judgement.
I have apologized to my son many times and even when we came out of the religion when he was 37 I told him I was sorry for teaching him the religion and he forgave me. Our relationship is so much better because I let him know I was wrong. So, go to your son and let him know you love him and you didn't handle his questions correctly but you are imperfect and you will try harder the next time. Also build him up because you tore him down and don't beat yourself up too much because we all make mistakes but it is how we handle it afterwards that is important.
Yup. Chill the F out. Try and remember hat whatever you say to your kids affects them 10x as much as you think. I can still recite arguments with my parents almost word for word when they went too far. How would you see it if he started calling you names instead of explaining himself?
No, "because I said so" is never good enough. If you want them to grow into self-sufficient responsible adults you do have to explain yourself. A lot. Don't just hope they will figure it out on their own. Knowing why certain decisions are made will make them question less, and make better decisions on their own.
I was raised with your parenting style. It took a LONG time to work out on my own, and I resented my upbringing because of it for a very long time. My folks and I are still not very close.
I think you need to go to anger management , are you kidding us ? Of course it was abusive . How old is your child ? your post paints you as a dictator
The G.B.dictates to the r&f , we give you spiritual food at the proper time , dont question us , do what we say or else .
Is your attitude to your child any different ? You need to take a good inward look at yourself . Sometimes we all need a wake up call. Take care .
smiddy
Data-Dog,
When your child grows up, how he remember you?
How will he treat you when you are old and possibly helpless and in need yourself?
Will he treat you like you are treating him?
Probably.
