They're Making it Impossible to Fade

by DarioKehl 31 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • DarioKehl

    For those of you who have already faded due to family still being in, have you noticed how the noose is tightening?

    If it's not memorial, it's special day assembly. If it's not that, it's convention or the special talk. Right? Well, lately, there are even more traps to keep you on a tight leash.

    Let's say you move some distance away to begin your fade. With JW dot org, your relatives can easily look up the KH for the territory you've moved into. Either they can contact the KH and send them your way, or, they can hound you constantly: "how do you like the such & such congregation?" (So as to let YOU know that THEY know where you SHOULD be going, implying further that they can easily find out whether or not you're active).

    Second are these constant "special event" deals piped in from headquarters every few months, usually on a Saturday. Whether it's a GB visit to a branch, the annual meeting or some other program, it's just another reason for your JW family to hound you; another thing to pull you in to that will mess up your fade. Turning down a "special event" is a red alert to every JW that something is "wrong." So, they keep having them... frequently... because they know faders can't have red alerts.

    Unless you're equipped with a $700 iPad on a window washer's budget, you're also quickly exposed by brining any outdated songbooks or bibles to a meeting (say you attend just to satisfy your family while you're in town on a visit). If you have the old songbook, it's a red flag that you've not been around for at least 9 months. That's the thing! They can time stamp your inactivity based on how outdated the contents of your meeting bag are!

    Also, the frequent terminology changes: PO = COBE, district is now region, there's no such thing as "special assembly day" anymore--but all circuit assemblies are only 1 day. Unless you're informed on the latest "newspeak," you're sure to out yourself as a fader simply by saying the wrong thing to the wrong person.

    Finally, and perhaps the most sinister, is this new method of having COPIES of your "No Blood" medical directive on hand. This is where we will all be forced into a tough decision. They WILL make sure this comes up--whether it's your old hall, a new one you've faded from or your JW relatives. They will--they MUST--hunt you down if for nothing else than to get this directive signed and have a copy of it. Not having a current no blood card is one thing. Having a KH KNOW it's not current is another. And it's arguably the biggest red flag/red alert one could have. So, when that knock comes, how will you answer your door? When the phone rings and your parents want confirmation of your updated medical directive (or they'll offer to come over immediately, watch you sign it, sign as your eyewitnesses* and retrieve a copy), how will you answer that call?

    *didnt I read somewhere that they now want qualified men (elders or MS) to sign as eyewitnesses on medical directives? I swear I saw that recently. If so, that's another excuse for an elder drop-in visit; another reason to pop up on their radar every year!

    It's true, everyone. A suscessful fade can only last a few months at most before their cycle of activities come around to bite you in the ass.

  • brandnew

    The main thing is not to panik! ! !

    And dont be scared, they are just nosey humans.

  • StephaneLaliberte
    Did you just say that the Elders want to keep a copy of your medical directives? That is, there is the one that you are expected to keep in your wallet and now they want a copy that is to be kept else where??
  • baltar447
    Stop living in fear. Just live your life.
  • ToesUp


    We have had this happen to us. Use the not feeling well/work schedule excuse as much as you can. If they start digging further, tell them you have some personal issues but give them NO details.

    The miranda rights state, "anything you say can and will be used against you." It goes for the JW police as well. As soon as you start talking they WILL hang you. Guarantee it. Also, if you give them NOTHING it will drive them insane. We all know JW's are the nosiest people on the planet and thrive on rummaging around in your underwear drawer and going through your movie collection.

    The miranda rights also state that you have the right to remain silent. Do just that!

    We are having a great time watching these fascinating people try to figure out what is going on with us. It's a mystery!

    If they become too intrusive tell them to mind there own business and get off your back. I'll repeat...IF YOU GIVE THEM POWER OVER YOU, THEY WILL TAKE IT.

    Relax and enjoy the ride.

  • Oubliette

    The doors to the kingdom hall allow you to exit just as easy as to enter.

    The only thing keeping you there are the chains of your mind.

    The elders, and--by extension--anyone in the organization for that matter, only have the authority that you allow them to have.

  • stuckinarut2

    Great post!


  • respectful_observer
    ecan6an hour agoDid you just say that the Elders want to keep a copy of your medical directives? That is, there is the one that you are expected to keep in your wallet and now they want a copy that is to be kept else where??

    Someone posted a group of new BOE letters a week or so ago:

    several of which are on the HLC/blood issue. One specific checklist for service group overseers directs them to ensure they have a current copy of each person's signed Advanced Medical Directive. Two excerpts from the checklist:

    You should confirm with each member of your group that they have a signed, witnessed and dated AD document, less than 5 years old. It is helpful to review the completeness and legibility of the document to ensure no mistakes have been made.
    For each member of your group, check that copies have been lodged with the witnesses of the AD document, the emergency contact, the publisher’s GP, and the congregation secretary.
  • pbrow

    This is simple.... Dont fade! If you are causing yourself that much angst and anxiety your are literally harming yourself by fading. I get that you will lose family and friends but are those family and friends worth making your self sick w/ anxiety??

    Make a clean break and then at least you will no longer have to cower in fear in your own skin.


  • pronomono

    I've been thinking about the Blood card a lot lately, and I figure that this will be the straw that breaks the camels back for me. Because when they insist that they have a signed copy, I will insist that they do not. I haven't carried a blood card in my wallet for over a year, and I am not going to start now. I've worked in the healthcare industry for a number of years and have a high respect for the HIPPA laws and regulations and will not be signing my rights away to a group of men, no matter how brainwashed and well-intentioned that some of them might be. This may place me on their radar, but that's okay. I would love to be outed for something as ridiculous as this. It would make walking away all that much easier.

    "So....why did you get disfellowshipped?"

    "Because I refused to sign a No Blood card giving the JW's HLC committee full rights to all my HIPPA protected medical data and let them decide what medical procedures should and should not be performed on me."

    Oubliette: Let's review: It's a cult!

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