Former Unbaptized Publisher, New Here

by GloomySunday 46 Replies latest jw friends

  • GloomySunday


    Former Unbaptized Publisher, here.

    I'm new to the forums and have hesitated for months to join this forum. I was raised in a JW family, and was never baptized, because one of my parents didn't think I should be baptized early.

    My mother became inactive, but I eventually went back for social contact, eventually starting a study. I raised a few questions, only to find that the conductor would get irritated and defensive when my questions would get deeper into the topic. I was skeptical about the bible and the existence of god. I also felt that the "bad association" rule was very prudish. That I could only befriend like-minded people, and they had to believe the exact same things. I felt that was wrong. Something never felt right...

    I also was very depressed and confused in that organization. It got so bad that I even contemplated suicide at some point, because I felt unworthy and sinful. Those were dark times.

    Eventually, I was fed up with the ever constricting rules, and confusing doctrines that I decided to ignore the "don't do independant research" rule, and go online to see if this would stand the test. And, to be honest, it was a turning point in my life. I had a spring in my step, I felt so alive. My depression was gone...

    My story is quick, (although, this is a rough draft, and I fear people identifying me, because I'm a fader) and not nearly as bad as some of the sad stories I've heard on here... I never was really shunned, but was not too aware of how deep of an impact it had on people.

    If you all want, you can share your experiences on this page, or just say hi. This is a mere introduction, so, good day to you all.

    With love, GloomySunday~

  • LostGeneration


    Trust your gut, a lesson I learned far too late. Looks like you were smart enough to avoid the pressure to get baptized.

    Hope to hear more from you in the days ahead.

  • LisaRose

    Welcome Gloomy Sunday, glad to have you here. You have good instincts, you are smart to question everything at this age. Do not let anyone tell you that you do not have to question things, or tell you that you shouldn't listen to your inner voice. I won't bore you with my story, except to say I converted at 13, with my parents, and didn't leave until I was 45. I wish I had the internet back then, it would have saved me a lot of heartache.

  • Hortensia

    Hi, glad you figured it all out

  • Julia Orwell
    Julia Orwell

    Hello and welcome.

    My thoughts were very much along the same lines as yours, but I was 12 years baptised. Glad you got out before you took the dip. And I'm glad you're here: this is a place for healing, ranting, asking- whatever you need :)

  • Vidqun

    Welcome Gloomy! Things can only get better from here on. Now go and study and get your degree or qualification in the field of your choice, according to your aptitude. Be supportive of your family. Don't look back.

  • GloomySunday

    Thank you all for the kind words, everyone!

    By the way, can anyone help me figure out how to reply to your comments? I can't seem to figure it out. ^^"

  • Julia Orwell
    Julia Orwell

    Me neither so I just copy and paste the quote I want or just write @[name] and then what I would like to reply.

  • Billy the Ex-Bethelite
  • GloomySunday


    I agree, my Father said he always trusted his gut, and that's probably why he never joined.

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