You will never be told who your accusers are, if they told you otherwise it is a lie. Theocratic warfare at its best. They just want to get you back in the room with 3 elders who will harass you as long as you let them, and then disfellowship you.
will a judicial comittee allow you to face your accusers
Label Licker ((((Hugs of friendship and concern)))))
This is the time to stay strong.
Do not show them weakness.
They come to destroy you, your husband and your reputation.
You have a lot of good advice here.
Get your proper rest, and stay calm when you face your adversary.
To be brutally honest, there is nothing to be gained from any of this. JC's are about attitude and "humility", they are not about facts and evidence. They are wanting a good, obedient, Jehovah's Witness "sheep"... and you are worried about fairness and justice. The two do not mix. So, as a whole, nothing good will come from this except your freedom from the religion and the control they have over your life to absorb your precious time... like the time spent on this issue.
My husband asked the elder why have they bypassed the one or two admonition rule with just two shepherds and they said that the aligation was serious enough to be a judicial committee yet he says it's just a meeting and that we haven't been judged yet. Doesn't there have to be a judgement call first in order to be a judicial meeting. We asked him three times over the phone and he couldn't give a straight answer. The co told him to meet with us and have a talk. Apparently it was something that was said along time ago but has just come to them now and they have to act on it. We said if it happened along time ago then isn't that just gossip by now. If it were that bad shouldn't it have been acted on then and why now. That that person withheld gossip and there are no witnesses but a couple of accusers. Tomorrow we phone bethel to see what our rights are. Now it's just lies and apostacy that we're being charged with. They were willing to do it in our home when it was an unexpected visit but now they are saying they want us to come to the hall instead where the holy spirit can flow freely, Hubby said what did the holy spirit do when they had to meet in peoples homes back in the bible times. The goon couldn't answer it. They said they can't figure out how we were doing so well and then we dropped off totally. For all you faders out there, your turn is coming. Society will eventually catch up to you if they know where you live and your not going to your meetings. They don't let you just walk away. A part of me will be relieved in one way to be rid of the gossip and always looking over my shoulders as well as no more nightmares. The nightmares are the worst and I just can't represent an org that's full of lies. You all have been wonderful and never will I take your kindness for granted. Will be in touch and so far everything has been monitored for our safety.
These are the impressions I have as one just on the peripheries of JW life, but as a detatched view it might have value. Despite all of the claims made that the elders are good shepherds, and only interested in the well being of the congregation, they aren't. That is a complete falsehood. The elders' priority is to protect the cleanliness and the integrity of the congregation. In other words, if you have said or done anything that makes them look bad, and people could find out about it, then they will cauterise the wound by your expulsion from their midst. You'll be thrown to the wolves all in the name of preserving the congregation and wider organisation. As for any support after the hearing, you can forget it, you'll be left to your own devices unless and until they think you've shown sufficient contrition to merit readmission.
In short watch your back. And remember, witnesses shoot their wounded.
A part of me will be relieved in one way to be rid of the gossip and always looking over my shoulders as well as no more nightmares.
Not "part" of you... ALL of you. And it is so refreshing to just... BREATHE. You inhale the life of the world around you with pure lungs and grasp it with honest skin. It's good to be rid of them.
For all you faders out there, your turn is coming. Society will eventually catch up to you if they know where you live and your not going to your meetings. They don't let you just walk away.
Which is why I went out in a blaze of f'n glory and wrote the whole thing down (backseatdevil.com) and never stepped foot in a kingdom hall again. AND the bastards STILL came after me recently. I'm gay, I drink, I smoke... I mean really, there are only SO many sins I'm willing to give up. But NONE of them for, as you put it, an " org that's full of lies".
Stay strong. MUCH LOVE. And thank you for keeping us posted. Please know your are not taken for granted either. ((HUG))
A judicial committee will allow you nothing.
They have a goal, you will have no rights.
One time, when facing a thief, all three elders lied to my face, then the thief exposed them! (he didn't realize what he was doing)
I told them they lied, showed them WTs, they just stared at me. I showed them WT articles, scriptures, they stared at me. They have power & control.
I have had other experiences that gave me PTS, no sleep, nightmares & more! Men, they are simply men. Nothing special.
After all of this, I urge you never ever ever ever to put yourself in their hands. Why? What great wisdom do they have? What is their goal? Would you put yourself into the hands of "worldly" people with the same intent?
Tell them you are emotionally upset, your health cannot deal with it, and your doctor has instructed you to avoid stress.
My motto? "Hell no, I won't go" .... ever, ever.... again!
The goon said that a jc committee is a "fact finding mission" to see if the alligations are true. Isn't that what shepherding calls are for to investigate and then give us a chance to say our side of the story and go talk to the one that has a complaint? He said we can do all that at this meeting. That we can ask all these questions at the judicial and that they are vital questions. This is the same goon that went to a sisters place to investigat what me and her husband were talking about.Three times we asked and he said that's what this meeting is all about and he is following the directions of the co. I bet they didn't tell the co that we had no shepherding calls. Goon said we did and we said that there was an elder who came with his wife and wanted to know how we can come back. And the other was another elder who came with a publisher(who was made a pioneer along with his wife before the co came to town ) and dumped twelve mags in my mailbox while my gates were opened and both times there were no bibles in hands and no two ELDERS in our home. The one sister told us that the elder told her that he was out to our place to give us a shepherding call and came back telling her that we were negative. Hello? I wasn't even there. Till this day noone has come to see me! WTH??????
Severe Gray area!
They are supposed to let you face your accussers according to scriptute but they will weasel out of it if they can.
Here is what happened to me:
During a CO visit my wife was out in service and the PO (who is a good friend of ours and still the only one who calls to see how we are doing) Told her that someone had made an accusation against me. It seems that I was going out to clubs and getting drunk(Now I will say that I did go out to clubs and drink but nowhere near as much and often as was represented.) Naturally my wife told me about this. Me being the direct no nonsense person I am, I went to the elder and asked him who made such accusations? This is where what little faith I had in the organization or the people in it crumbled. I was told that it was someone from another hall, that said they saw me. Now I'm the type of guy who doesn't hang with many people. It is very few who I term, in my heart and by my actions, a friend. So hearing this and being able to count on one hand the number of people I hang out with, let alone drink with...I am now puzzled. SO, I go to my 'friend' and tell him whats going on (at this point we are in the same congo.) He says he will try to find out what the deal is. This goes on for about 2 months with the elders knowing that they have to talk to me cause the allegation was made but scared( and I do mean afraid, they are all aware that I will turn the bible scripture's that allow me to face my accuser against them.)
So during the public talk one sunday they say they want to talk to me. I am ready armed with all of the pertinent scriptures and righteous indignation. At the song between the talk and WT, I tell my 'friend' that the bro's want to talk to me and I will force them to reveal my accuser. Sadly for some reason I dont take notice that he left the meeting right after my telling him this.
So we go to the back room me and 2 elders. I dont think I let them say the first words. I hit them with the scriptures from deut. and acts that say you have a right to face your accuser and plead your case. They acknowledge that I am right and they will tell me who made the accusations. They then proceed for the next 15 minutes to get me to make a promise. For 15 minutes they asked me to not seek retaliation and to not get mad and how the accuser really only sought my best interest. After they felt and I assured them, that I would not do anything, they told me it was my 'friend' who had made the charge against me.
Needless to say my mouth dropped. They then reminded me of my promise not to hurt him. Y'no the funny thing is...they did not counsel me at all. They just spent all that time trying to make sure I dont do anything to harm him.