Why elders' wives are such gossipers...

by Calebs Airplane 53 Replies latest watchtower scandals

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  problemaddict

  I think it is alot like some people, who always eem to have the conversation drift into "work". It takes effort to be interesting, and in some cases to conversate depending on the audience. So "talking shop" is the easy way out, especially if there is any relation or commonality.

  So I think it very much becomes the easy thing to talk about. Elders justify slander and judgement all of the time. Hasn't anyone ever heard of someone in effect (or verbatim) saying, "lets just talk.....elder to elder."
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  Reopened Mind

  I was an elder's wife. I was told by a sister that when I was I a car group the gossip stopped. I know it was because when I heard something I would tell my husband so the elders could handle it.

  My husband was careful not to share what was going on in the congregation with me.

  Please, Calebs Airplane, don't paint all elders wives as gossips. Yes, I know some are.

  All of us apostates are not "mentally diseased", "drug addicts", or "drunkards".

  Reopened Mind
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  Watchtower-Free

  I found a easy way to find out all sorts of stuff was to

  go out in service in a car group of elders .

  They use the faulty logic of thinking just not using names

  makes gossip ok . Real brain surgeons .
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  Calebs Airplane

  My sincerest apologies to all those ex-elder's wives who weren't gossipers when they were in... In retrospect, I shouldn't have made such a broad generalization... In my defense, though, for over 3 decades I had nothing but gossping elder's wives around me constantly. It was really sickening to hear that brother rebel was seen having a beer in a bar or that sister sexy shows too much cleavage or that brother educated thinks he's better then everyone else... I beleieve most of this gossip had a common denominator... jealousy...
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  aSphereisnotaCircle

  The only way an elders wife can gossip is if she got the info from her gossipy elder husband.

  The elders are the initial big mouths, they are the ones that start it.

  Many elders in my circut could not keep their mouths shut, they LOVED spreading juicy gossip. They would make jokes about it, frequently saying things like, "I wont tell you their name, just their initials" and then they would laugh.

  They found people with emotional/mental issues particularly intertaining and fun to makes jokes about them.
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  Auntfancy

  I was an elders wife and my husband never told me anything that was going on and I never asked. I never looked in his brief case or files at home or through the phone bills. He kept everything to himself and I am glad he did. He wasn't one to gossip to other elders and if he wasn't involved in a committee and didn't want to know what it was about. I did have a "friend" that knew everything that was going on and she claimed her husband didn't tell her but he had to have told her because she knew everything and I mean everything. She also told me people would go to her with things that had happened instead of going to the elders so she knew that way too.
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  Auntfancy

  In the last cong we were in the COBE was the biggest gossiper I ever met. He would tell me all kinds of things because I was an elders wife. If he did it today I would definately say something. He spread a terrible rumor about someone being an apostate when they weren't. The sad thing is he is a big time elder on the HLC and other projects.
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  ÁrbolesdeArabia

  Sometimes with all the poisonous gossip, it's hard to forget all the genuine loving Christian elder's wives who were a good influence on the congregations. I am guilty of not qualifying my posts by adding remarks that wonderful women exist, existed who did not spread gossip or quelshed it like fine examples of Blondie and all the beautiful women on JWN and those who still remain in the Congregation and refuse to hear the miasma.

  Constantly we are/were told how great the JW Elders and Elderettes are and their example we need to follow! I know everyone heard this barrage of proganda repeatedly from the platform, meetings and Convention parts. Accordingly with great responsibility, they are put under a heavy scrutiny because Jesus said "Much would be demanded from those in charge!"

  To all the good women who were a incredible asset for the Congregation, thank you for not giving in to the poisonous filth and standing up to your counterpart elderettes by killing gossip and lies at the source!
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  Glander

  My uncle was a cong. servant and then elder for about 50 years. He told my aunt everything and she told my grandmother and my grandmother told my mother, etc. We often knew who was getting DF'd and why before the announcement to the cong.
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  Quendi

  “Where there is no wood, the fire goes out; and where there is no slanderer, contention grows still.” So says one of Solomon’s proverbs. Damaging gossip gets around a congregation because elders refuse to keep confidences. Those who break confidences are supposed to be deleted, but we all know that happens as often as the sun rises in the west. Not all elders break confidences, but enough of them do to cause real pain and harm to individuals. If they kept their mouths shut, others—wives, different publishers, or what have you—would have nothing to tell others.

  That doesn’t mean that those who receive this information are blameless. They should not only keep silent but soundly reprove the person who has broken the confidence. Many times they do neither and compound the original offense by spreading the information around. I don’t doubt in my case that plenty of people in my former congregation know that I was disfellowshipped for being a gay man. Since I have no reason to return, it doesn’t matter now but it would if I were seeking reinstatement.

  Quendi