by Botzwana 23 Replies latest jw friends
I was known as Bane on here....I have gone through alot. This is my story as best as I can recollect. It has taken alot of courage to write this and post this...Be gentle...
http://monstercafesaltillo.blogspot.mx/2013/03/my-jehovahs-witness-story-part-1.html
Feel free to comment. I could use the encouragement.
Hello Botswana (Bane), and welcome back! I haven't read your story yet, but I just pulled up the website, bookmarked it, and will start reading once I am done with this post. I just wanted to say hello first, and once I am done reading your story, I will let you know.
I hope that you find the encouragement that you need and are looking for.
Take care, and I wish you a terrific day!!!
The only bane i remember here posted comments such as this one found on this thread " in conclusion"
See? HAHA! One of your OWN has left because you apostates are scum! I love it! Then you berate him for when he leaves...
Mockings etc. is what goes on here. You just keep on proving what your yourselves are....
Thanks Botswana,
You have been through some serious crap with the JWs.
I too have noticed the extreme lack of love in a group of people who preach love, love, love.
We recently had serious floods come through our area and the JWs couldnt have cared less. Our 'worldly' friends did sooo much for us though. Raising money, giving gifts, cards, accomodation and so much support and hard work.
I totally get why you left. Sorry about your Dad passing, he sounds like an awesome Dad to have.
Recovering, forgiveness and letting bygones be bygones is a good thing, especially when others also had a part in previous confrontations and using poorly chosen words.
Botswana, I just finished part 1 of your story. It was well written, easy to follow, and it kept my attention, even though I have a form of attention deficit disorder. You really loved your Father, and it sounds like you had a nice bond with him, something that many of us never had with our own Fathers. You were blessed, and I'm very happy for you! I'm sure you consider yourself very lucky to have had such a great relationship with him. He must have been quite the architect since he studied under the tutorage of the legendary Frank Lloyd wright! Wow, that is a very impressive resume! I bet he had all kinds of neat stories about his time spent working with Mr. Wright. Do you still have any of your Dad's blueprints, or any drawn up by Mr. Wright himself? I bet they are worth a pretty penny if you do, and if you ever did decide to sell them, you would make quite a nice profit! Then again they probably hold great sentimental value to you, and there are some things that we just can''t get rid of, no matter how much someone is willing to pay.
It is dissappointing but typical that the JWs were given many chances to show the love that they claim to have, but denied you any of that supposed compassion and empathy with the exception of a select few who tried to at least make an attempt help you. What is worse are the ones who take advantage monetarily if they have a chance to make a nice profit off of ones who need the money as the one did to you and your father by buying the $1000 painting for $50. Talk about kicking someone when they are down! Sad that the good ones who do have genuine love seem to be few and far between among the supposed happiest people on Earth. I try to cut JW's some slack, and try not to be overly critical, but there is a limit, and there comes a time when one realizes that there are serious problems with the poor attitude and lack of genuine love amongst many of them and the way they interact and treat others both inside and outside of their cliques.
I'm sorry that your marriage didn't work out, and that the JW's had a part in your marriage problems, even though your wife seemed to be self centered. Relationships are supposed to be pretty much equal, and when one party is willing to take but not give back it puts a big strain on the other person and is very unfair. When you are ready, I hope that you find a Partner that is willing to give back and invest in your realtionship on a more equal basis. Only then will you be truly happy.
You've been through a lot, and you lost the most important person in your life, your Dad. Every time you think about him though, and reminisce about the times that you spent together and the love and respect that you both had towards each other, a part of him stays alive.
As I said before, your story was well written, and I look forward to reading part 2 when you are ready to post it.
Always believe in yourself and follow your heart. It will help you as you contemplate your future and what you decide you want to do with your life. Please don't let depression get the best of you as it did when you wanted to end your own life. From what I've read, you appear to be a very strong person, and I'd be willing to bet that you are able to take past bad experiences and use them as life lessons to strengthen you and help you grow even stronger both emotionally, and spiritually if that is what you are looking for.
Take care, and good job!!!
Botzwana.................... (((((((((Hugs)))))))))
I am so sorry your family ever heard of that group of men from Brooklyn, let alone joined their "Club".
I am so sorry to hear of the passing of your great Dad. Your comment that they didn't want someone, who was trained under Frank Lloyd Wright, to rock their little safe world, is probably correct. What a disappointment for him.
When your house burns down and everything is gone, if you don't need help then, when would it be? Disgusting how these JW's treated you.
I can imagine the joy your father felt, his son is married and bringing his wife home! Cocktail shrimp for 200! What a happy party your dad felt in his heart for you! I am so, so, so sorry how those uncaring, heartless, cruel JW's treated you and your dad and your wife.
Where does the cruelty, stop? Your dad is dead in the next room and the Elder throws him under the bus? Heartless!
You have been divorced for 3 years, your ex is renting a place with a man, and they hassle you?
You and your dad must have really upset the Elders with your heart of gold. I can only wish you and all of us who have been mistreated by this Book Club, a long and healthy and happy life.
Just Lois
Botswana, Please don't allow yourself to get so down hearted that you want to do yourself in. Would you consider getting rid of your gun? Sell it? Your life and how good you live it, is a testimony to your dad and how much he loved you. If you can, in time, have children. You are the only one left to tell them about the grandpa they will never meet. And yes. Leave your mom, Mommy Dearest, out of the picture. Focus on your dad and how he would want you to have a good, long life. He would not want you to commit suicide.
Thank you for sharing your heart-breaking story.
Just Lois
I remember the "Bane" days with your futile scripturalizing, I knew back then you were trying to convince yourself.
You have had a tough time but keep looking to the future, and let the past fade into the background. Easier said than done, I know!
Botswana, wow, what a story you have to tell. I can't wait to read more.
I just commented on another thread that Jemba started on the lack of love in the organisation, so I won't repeat myself. But, they really seem to have gone out of their way to be sh*tty to you & your dad. One thing that struck me was that your dads professional accomplishments must have prompted jealousy from some of those guys in the congregation who would never be able to achieve anything like that in their sad lives. You went to college & lived some as well, so I would imagine they would be threatened by you also.
Please if your feeling down now botzwana, it's temporary, it will pass. There are lots of good things waiting for you, I know this because your true self jumps out at us from your writing! Do something kind for yourself, you have survived so much crap!
Listen to Lois Lane above, she's a very smart cookie!
Here's some encouraging hugs ((())) and a
Hi there,
I just took the time to read what you wrote. Having experienced firsthand the cruelty of the organization myself, I get it. My heart breaks for you.
Don't let them win. Your life and your happiness are worth a great deal - more than you can know right now, and far more than the Witness organization will ever want you to believe.
You hold the brightest torch for your father's memory. Don't let that torch go out before its time.
