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sosoconfused

Hello everyone, just wanted to say hi and introduce myself.

I am a mid 30's just stepped aside elder, who just couldn't handle it anymore.

I am a 3rd generation born-in and former pioneer and bethelite. It has been a log somewhat confusing ride for me, but I am finally settling in to realizing that I need to really look at what me and my family are doing.

Its funny though what really got me here... it wasn't the 40 year old men telling me they were looking at boobies on the computer and hoping not to get in trouble, it wasn't the watching young people bail left and right, it wasn't the ever changing new light etc... but a simple thought.

What about the Dinka, the American Indians, the Chinese etc... Not just the fact that we are not reaching them with the message of the bible - but if everyone on the ARK new and worshipped Jehovah why was it when they got off the ARK they just totally said screw that and once again almost the entire earth was ignoring JEHOVAH. WOuldn't that lead to a society similar to the one that was just destroyed with the exception that there were no NEPHELIM?

Why would Jehovah ignore all these people and just focus on ABraham? But here is the kicker - if you would have been born anywhere in the work outside of Israel you get a free pass to everlasting life. So all those Africans / Asians / Europeans / Aboriginesesesesesesese have no idea who the true god is, they get to live a carefree life in this system and then get resurrected to a PARADISE EARTH were they will live for 1000 years free from any sickness etc and if they stay faithful undre perfect conditions will live forever(who wouldn't believe that this GOD IS RIGHT and adhere to his laws in that setting???)

On the other hand I worship god faithfully for 10 - 70 years preaching and bam... I watch some gay porn and I die.

Amelia Ashton

Welcome sosoconfused.

I had similar thoughts about my toxic non jw parents. If the Big A didn't come soon they were going to get a free pass through death but I only "might" make it even though I was worshipping, preaching, studying etc etc etc.

punkofnice

Welcome to the board. I am also a former elder. I now no longer believe in god or the bible.

I'm living my life now, a life that was destroyed from my childhood by a big business posing as a religion.

Welcome to the real world.

Regards Paul

Fernando

A hearty warm welcome sosoconfused!

Since we are a mixed bag here you are sure to find a flavour that suits.

Greetings, blessings and peace to you and yours

Fernando

PS - I was also a 3rd gen born-in. Started awakening end 2005. Walked out for good mid-2009.

perfect1

Hello, I think you are now on the path to becoming unconfused. Like you, Im a 3rd generation born in but I made my escape early with the help of of psychologist, anti-depressants, and a suicide threat.

I hope to hear more from you.

sosoconfused

I must say I have been lurking for a long time. I ooked at my parents who are very old now and they have nothing, but my mom pioneers with awful health problems and my aged dad is an overly stressed elder. I hang on for them because I know me outright leaving would result in a painful few years for them both.

My wife is really catching on now and everyday she has some form of gripe, but my daughter is always asking me why am i not going to the meeting. That hurts badly... I have missed about 4 in a row and i can tell she is confused.

The funny thing I noticed however is that my time spent at Bethel was full of people who doubted everything or just didn't give a crap. As I search for them, most are long gone. Or like myself have started to slide and it is alarming. Those Bethel days were so full of confusing times and scary things that always stuck with me and made me always question everything else

Lozhasleft

Hello and welcome. It's good to hear that you've woken up, however it happened. The WTBS don't have the truth, they are a multi million dollar property company running on legalistic rules and regulations, and can't possibly have Jah's spirit. If you haven't already done so you would benefit from reading Ray Franz's book "Crisis of Conscience" which offers remarkable insight into the GB.

Loz x

cedars

sosoconfused - welcome to the forum!

You make a great point about all those non-Jewish civilizations throughout the ages. Billions of people who, through sheer ignorance, supposedly get a free ticket into a new paradise earth when they die.

Crazy stuff. How didn't we see it?

Cedars

Emery

Welcome, its great seeing new ones waking up.

Thoughts like these are very common. How can you fathom a loving almighty God destroying billions of people because of spiritual ignorance? How can the bible claim that God is impartial yet judaic history shows that God was very partial and destroyed nations to make way for his chosen Jewish people? Whether it is within the realm or time frame of the flood or our present day, it seems like a huge paradox and contradiction for salvation.

When you start examining the bible and placing everything within its historical context, you will begin to see things in a better light. Parables only refectling principals and morals not double fullfilling false prophecies. Stories of the bible representing an ancient time, not a bunch of parallels to a modern day organization.

Fernando

BTW sosoconfused I'm delighted to hear that you could no longer handle being a part of the ruling religious clergy class (Pharisees).

When searching the Watchtower library for the word "legalism" one comes across a great article which reads like a summary of ISOCF.

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