One experience in our old Kingdom Hall that still HAUNTS me

by Newly Enlightened 52 Replies latest jw experiences

  • sir82

    Doesn't surprise me much.

    My best guess is that the "other pioneer", the elder's wife, had some sort of resentment or jealousy or grudge against your daughter, and pounced on the opportunity. Probably withheld the "marital due" until her husband acquiesced and convinced the other elders that such a talk was necessary.

  • mamochan13

    NE - your story brought back many memories for me of the pioneering heirarchy. When I pioneered I was always left out because my dad was not a JW - the rest of the young pioneers were all children of elders. I recall one circuit assembly the overseer individually gathering up all the pioneers, then they brought them all out on stage, announcing, "We'd like you to meet all of the pioneers in our circuit." Except me. I was not invited.

    There are many, many insensitive elders. That they would even give a talk like that singling our your daughter speaks volumes about how little they actually care for individuals. So glad you and your family have escaped together.

  • clarity

    Dear Newly & dear daughter Gojira ... hope this place

    will bring you both 'healing' from this awful cultish religion!


    The angst & grief of you as a father is so plain to see, our

    children were so vulnerable .... but most of us didn't see it.


    We trusted those 'bums' with our most valuable things.

    We thought they would be respected & their best interests

    looked after!

    Little did we know this borg does not care about children!

    We were admonished to 'beat them with a rod', and make them

    afraid ... of everything.


    My congregation "overseer" tormented my little 5 yr old by

    asking him " What would you do, if someone put a gun to your

    head and said not to go door to door & meetings ..... ????


    Sickening ...

    my worst regret is ever getting my kids into this cult!

    Most have left thankful .. but there is still the fu#^ u% residue!


  • Nambo

    Didnt Jesus warn about men who dressed as sheep but inside were ravenous wolves?

    The JWs do seem to be featured in Biblical prophesy, just not the ones they claim.

  • JWOP

    They always play favorites in the congregations.

    In the late 1990's my nephew, "Grant" was a young adult. A young sister at the KH, who happened to be the daughter of an "anointed" brother, accused Grant of inappropriately touching her. He vehemently denied it; and it was just his word against hers, no "two witnesses" to the alleged accusation. Grant was marked, a marking talk was given, and all his congregation privileges were revoked -- he and his mother (my sister) were devastated. Several weeks later the sister confided to one of her friends that she made the whole story up. The friend told the elders about it, upon which the elders immediately gave Grant back his privileges. What else did they do? NOTHING! No public apology, and the accusing sister DIDN'T get ANY reproof/correction/discipline for her defamatory actions! NOT ONE THING!

  • fulltimestudent

    Based on my own experience and knowledge I suggest that the elders in that miserable congregation were out of line. Not getting hours is NOT a reason for 'marking.'

    The real problem of course, is that ever since the beginning of Christianity, the movement has been cursed by the inexperience and ignorance of so many involved in 'leadership.' Hence the need for later Bible writers to emphasise the teaching role of the holy spirit, and the use of apologetic statements such as Matthew 11:25, 1 Corinthians 2:5, etc.

    To speak plainly so many elders are just plain dumb!

  • BluesBrother

    I have to agree with the poster above who suggested that this may have been a botched "special needs" talk, rather than a "marking"...but I am sure that it certainly sounded like one! . Was it based on a K M programme for that night? Even so, in the circumstances you describe one would have thought they would have adjusted it so as not to be offensive. If they did their job, they would have helped her.

    Kingdom Ministry 3/95 p 7

    "Regular pioneers are required to devote 1,000 hours each year to the ministry. By the end of February, some pioneers find that they have fallen behind, and this can lead to discouragement. The elders can often be helpful to pioneers, giving them encouragement and practical suggestions. This can make the difference between pioneers successfully meeting their requirements for the year or dropping off the list."

    I have seen more people end up here because of rude and useless elders than anything else.....

  • tornapart

    Having been a reg pioneer in my younger years and having an accident and not getting my time in I can really feel for your daughter. For me it was back in the 70's when things were much more relaxed. The elders encouraged me. I even wrote to the society apologising () and suggesting I came off the list. They sent a lovely encouraging letter back. (That would NEVER happen now!)

    If that happened here in my cong. now to any pioneer, I think I'd be out of the door and not looking back.

  • Pink sapphire
    Pink sapphire

    That is such an awful experience to have, especially since pioneering is voluntary. Others have done far worse and never been marked.

    I was not marked, but reproved for going on a night out with other young people from the congregation, they all went into a nightclub and I waited outside, with another single brother. We were both pioneers and our crime was being alone together. The rest of them that came out drunk got off scot free. Well, I've learned my lesson since then ... Always go into the club and enjoy yourself.

    Interestingly the elder who reproved us ran off with his bible study a few months later and left his family devastated. bet he put his hours in. Just shows!!

  • The Searcher
    The Searcher

    @ JWOP

    I have been involved in two separate events in two different congregations with the complete body of elders. (my nickname's Lucky Joe!!) The most glaring aspects in both circumstances were;

    1) All of the elders closed ranks against me.

    2) Both bodies of elders were proven wrong and corrected by the Branch/C.O. (I had to contact both)

    3) Not one single elder apologised for what they did - on the contrary, I was treated like a snitch!

    The word 'humility' is not in many elder's vocabulary, mainly due to the fact that they've struggled to get to that position on the ladder, and they're not going to let some squirt of a publisher knock them off their pedestal.

    Are any elders lurking here? Please take note!!

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