The BEST way to "wake up" a JW

by Phizzy 46 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

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  Phizzy

  We have debated this over many years and in many threads, as all of us have family and/or former friends still in. It seems that there is no "Best" way to wake up a JW, it is as elusive as the "true" religion it seems.

  But a comment made by poster "Emery" on another thread stood out to me, he/she said :

  "What I have gathered is that most witnesses seem to be in it for emotional reasons. When presented logical irrefutible evidence of the Watchtower's dishonesty and hypocrisy, no matter how persuasive the argument, it does nothing. Thats why it takes an emotional ass kicking to start waking up. "

  Is it not true that in reality ALL JW's must now be in for emotional reasons first of all ? The belief that it is the "truth" must be a long way down the list of reasons, beacause all the doctrinal changes make that belief as dodgy as believing Bernie Madoff will make you rich. Believing that many of the doctrines are true has an emotional base too, the paradise earth lie especially.

  So, surely the best way to start to try to wake up JW's, if we ever wish to, is to start at the emotional level, something that they find upsetting about the way they or others are treated, Biblical doctrine, Watchtower history and their lies, all that can come much later.

  What do you think ?
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  cantleave

  Slowly.

  Until someone is ready to wake up, they won't.
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  Amelia Ashton

  If some-one is unconscious a quick slap will some-times wake them up and in a similar way a shock is what will wake some dubs.

  Gentle reasoning no matter how convincing will not work if they are unconscious.
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  MMXIV

  Phizzy, yes. Even JW's warn about being "stumbled" which is surely when another JW or the GB do something to "hurt" you emotionally. I'd say it is an important factor although others such as learned behaviours, routine, social dependency all conspire to keep people in.

  I disagreed with most of the pivotal teachings, lifestyle and impact on my prospects yet it took me years to leave. This was because of fear of not being socially and financially independent. I'd agree to a certain extent that an emotional kick led me to decide to go but frankly there had been dozens, maybe hundreds of those - I felt as a JW that rejection and emotional upset was a daily way of life.

  The silent lambs BBC program played a powerful part - that made me so angry. I guess that is doctrine but maybe all those emotional embarassments, humiliations, anger at stupid magazine articles or talks or answers played their part.

  mmxiv
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  jwfacts

  That is quite true. However, there are many raised as JWs and many studying with them that are not aware of the history or changes, so those ones can potentially be reached with reason as well.
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  Phizzy

  I was born in, over half a century ago, and stayed in for more than 5 decades, it was for doctrinal reasons I left, but I am not an example of why most wake up.

  I just feel that being aware that all JW's are primarily, and first of all, to be tautological, "in" for emotional reasons, therefore that is the Achilles heel, we must first of all engage their emotions, any other route is such an uphill struggle.

  Trying to get a JW to think and reason, to research, to actually use the intellectual part of their brain is like tying to push water uphill. But their emotional responses work fine, witness how upset they get when they perceive an attack on their beliefs.

  We need to work with what actually confronts us, a person "in" because of feelings firstly.
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  notsurewheretogo

  Dubs have to "choose" to wake up...blue pill red pill type thing...I was a frequent reader on this site and many but was still very much in until I was ready...despite all my irrefutable logical evidence presented to my wife she is not ready and is still in...

  Nothing you can say can change a dub until they themselves are ready...Steve Hassan's books cover topics like this...well worth a read to help someone out of the borg...
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  Giordano

  It is similar to soldiers who are fighting in wars. When asked the reason they fight, or when wounded and still planing on returning to their platoon, the answer is the responsibility they feel to their buddies back on the front lines.

  JW's form strong emotional bonds with their fellow witnesses, their doctrines are like military rules and regs it's the glue that holds the discipline together. The culture that has developed in both groups is more important for most then the beliefs or regulations that can change quickly.
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  should have known better

  This is so true for probably the majority of jw's i know, however, a few weeks after a stay in hospital i recieved a visit from the co who was visiting the cong, his "upbuilding" comments were all on a pure'ly emotional level trying to draw from me an emotional response. I explained to him my reason for being a jw was simply "the truth" this did not go down very well. As jw facts says to some reason rather than emotion can be the wake up call, that was certainly true in my case.
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  SophieG

  I know for me it was a slow emotional wakeup call that started my personal exodus. I was emotionally EXHAUSTED by trying to live that life.

  When I (carefully) talk to friends and family, what I hear most is mainly an emotional reason why they are still in. One friend said that the truth helped her clean up her life and that without it she would be a “ho”. That statement in itself tells me that what the “truth” teaches is not sustainable. Yes, learning to live “morally” is awesome but she did not seem to grasp that now that she is living that life SHE can sustain it by making good choices and not because the “truth” makes her walk straight. I know I have family members still in who have been presented doctrinal flip-flops but the thought that this is not the “truth” scares them. “Where are we to go?” is that common statement I hear all the time. It’s a fear of the unknown/Big A/missing out on pet lions… that will keep a lot of our loved ones in.

  The WTBS has definitely used the “E” in BITE to keep folks from ever believing that they can really LIVE.

  In my efforts to help others out, I think actions speak louder than words. They see it’s possible to live a normal good life. Then maybe when they see that, they will be more susceptible to the drip method of breaking down the lies the WTBS spews that keeps them captive.