Recently i told you all that i wanted to e-mail two friends some of the things i was struggling with in an effort to help them wake up or at least for them to understand me...97% of you all told me that it was a bad idea. I still decided to do it. So i e-mailed her SINCERELY asking questions on five points---1) Health care flip flops 2) False prophecies 3) Mediatorship of Jesus 4) UN 5)1918.
She replied about 8 hours after. She said," I really wish i could help but all i can continue to do is keep praying for you. You need to keep seeking the help of the elders. They can assist you. Keep reaching out for their help until you are better."
Three days after she and the sister who studied with me came to visit. They said that they're missing me and they didn't come to make me feel bad. We eventually got into talking about the organization. It's not easy talking to faithful witnesses about problems with the organization. Everything can be fixed with,"It's a perfect organization made up of imperfect people," or ,"Wait on Jehovah. The light gets brighter."
I was asked,"Do you think that you are just looking for an excuse to leave?" "Do you think that you're being controlled by demons? Look through your clothes to see if there's any demon things."
It was frustrating. I eventually gave up and just listened. What they were telling me was equivalent to this---If i asked you if Sally (the organization) if she's lying or wrong,would you send to Sally to ask her if she's lying or if she's wrong? OF COURSE NOT! That's stupid!
During the conversation my friend said that she could never believe that the organization was affiliated with the UN.
They eventually left.
15 minutes after they left i sent her a link to the UN site. She replied,"Hey,
Sorry I'm so late in replying. Looked at it last night but was too exhausted to reply. You are correct, however, it's not membership like that of states where they are lending support to a 'world government'. It was affiliated with the Department of Public Information. Doing so I believe would make sense because it would have allowed us to be aware of the happenings of the UN and so in some ways I would imagine help us to keep abreast with where we are in these times. I can't say why we withdrew membership, perhaps it was because the requirements for membership changed and went against bible principles. That is me speculating though.
Thank you for sharing. I hope that Jehovah will point you in the direction that you need to go and that you will allow yourself to be guided by his spirit."
On Monday, the sister that i studied with called and we spoke again. I told her that when i don't go to meetings i feel as though my life has no purpose. This is how i truly feel at times. I should not have told her because she then tries to get me to come back to meetings. She tels me that i will not get any answers out there in the world. I am the youngest in my family and the only one who is baptised. She told me that if my light is off (not shining) then, inn effect, i'm killing the rest of my family because none of them can get baptised. I told her that i'm not surre i'm ready to go back to meetings. She tells me that i've made my choice. I've chosed the malediction over the blessing. She then leaves.
All this time i was getting missed calls from an elder. I text him and tell him that i'm having some problems. The Co-ordinating Elder just wants his report for last month. I have none.
On thursday night i get a message from the Co-ordinator Elder( Presiding Elder.) "I will like to meet with you."
