questions (page 4)

Londo111

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Trlinb3Fp8E&list=PLyNx0oM_bmgAPkxpoL6pOB0CdY5anHbLC&index=5

Understand what you are getting into first...

Welcome DanielC, If you GF is willing to watch this video Strategic Interactive Approach explained 2003 (1:23:23), your relationship might have a chance of surviving. You should definitely watch the video.

Relationships are difficult even without unnecessary drama. When you marry a person, you are also marrying into their family so carefully consider how much unnecessary drama you are willing to deal with from future in-laws that have shown no interest in meeting you.

Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

Robert

Clambake

So what, If they were super uber dubs she would have been booted along time or disfellowed.

You are both on the verge of adulthood. Get married and move away. If the family are really poisonous people, it might be better to put some distance between her and her family.

ToesUp

Don't do it. The JW religion will dig to your VERY core and you will never be the same. They get under your skin and up you a**.

Tough when you are first in love but as time goes on you just don't realize how much the JW thing affects every aspect of your life.

There isn't a day that goes by that I wish I wasn't born in to the craziness of the JW's.

Fernando

Is it just me, or why do all the Pharisees in Londo's video look less evil than the GB?

joe134cd

I've been thinking over night about how I would reply to you so I'm going to give you a bit of advise from a person who has just recently left after 4 decades in the religion. I'm so glad that when I left that I had never married in the religion. Leaving was a heavy burden for me and I am absolutely convinced if a spouse and kids had also been involved it would of put me in a psychiatric ward. Every day I have to carry with me what I know and in some ways I wish I hadn't gone down this road. But what I know is done and cannot be reversed . Even though I'm not married to a JDub because I still have family (it would break my father's heart if he knew how i felt) and financial ties I'm forced to keep my mouth shut and suffer in silence. This is an example of a case I read on here just recently and if anyone has the link please include it. Young girl (mid 20s) who although never a witness had family connections and decided to join the religion. After a year or so of studying decided to marry her boyfriend - and probably a guy she wouldn't of married had it not been for the religion. Making spiritual progress and almost to the point of baptism when the bomb shell drops and decides to research the religion on the internet. So here she is married to guy who she probably wouldn't of and finds out that the religion isn't what it says it is. She's then having please explain sessions with elders and having it all explained away with stock standard answers of pray, study, field service more/ human imperfection/ new light etc. More than likely if she voices her concern in the congregation would be unofficially shunned and labeled an apostate. Unfortunately she never posted again so I don't know what happened but you can imagine the situation she is in. Thankfully and to your credit you have seen both sides of the coin early on, so you know what you are getting into and if it dose come back to bite you, you can't say you weren't toldm

millie210

You dont sound insane - even mildly. You sound like an intelligent person who happens to be in love with someone.

The situation you are struggling to describe is what "sounds" insane.

And maybe it is, it certainly didnt seem that way to me not too long ago when I was right in the center of it!

But now it does. Anytime you have a group of any kind that tries to alter behavior so much that people find alternate ways to express the behavior while still trying to comply with the group, there is a problem.

Its that simple.

The whole birthday gift a couple weeks later is a prime example of that.

This girl meeting you and falling in love with you and dating you for 4 years is another.

For more lenient Jws (like it sounds her family may be) it breaks down like this:

"weak" JWs are semi ok - especially if they are family

Disfellowshipped witnesses are either bad or you sneak to have a relationship depending on if you are emotionally inclined AND/OR you feel what was done to them by the elders was "fair or not"

"worldly people" (non believers) are ok to work with and visit (again. esp if related to them) but NOT to marry because people in the Kingdom Hall community will judge you on every level for that.

You could be a famous surgeon and you might as well be a drug dealer as for how a staunch JW would see it.

So if you can think of a way to change how the family will have to explain you to their JW community that may be an angle.

I guess a lot will depend on honest conversations between you and your girlfriend.

a watcher

Yes, it is wrong to join just so you don't lose her. It's selfish.

The only legitimate reason to join is because you LOVE JEHOVAH.

If you don't love Jehovah, you're wasting your time being one of JW's.

OUTLAW

Yes, it is wrong to join just so you don't lose her. It's selfish.
The only legitimate reason to join is because you LOVE JEHOVAH.
If you don't love Jehovah, you're wasting your time being one of JW's.....a watcher

Read that post very carefully..

There`s plenty of more crazy where that came from..

You`ll be facing that mindset on a daily basis and..

.

.........................................................THERE`S 7 MILLION OF THEM..

Image result for conformity

out4good4

That must be one spectacular piece of a$$ to make you want to go and change your whole life to suit the JW mood she's in.

You might want to look up the posts by a member here SD7 and take what he did as an object lesson.

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