I understand OODAD, more than you could think. For some months before my DF and certainly after, I struggled so so much. In retrospect, divorcing my ex (misogynist) husband after 30 yrs of hell, caused a kind of breakdown for me. It was so hard, trying to keep going for my youngest, fighting for a home for us, struggling with no income while home schooling her, it brought me to my knees. My older kids judged me for staying so long in the marriage, for trying to fight back, for striving to survive. They were all so busy being good JWS at the time. I found it unbelievably hard to face up to the life I'd lost, all those years of my prime, now in my 50s, on a sick twisted man who'd had a very different and sick agenda. My older kids weren't there for me and my youngest, despite all my years of mothering, despite what they'd witnessed. The wonderful WTBS elders played their parts in totally messing us all up.
Then came the DF for smoking some cigarettes, totally unjustified considering my sincere repentance, that took me to suicide attempts, alcohol to kill the pain, whatever. I ended up with cancer. One child turned up at the hospital after my surgery, to urge me only to apply for reinstatement. That was the only way he saw to help to be fair. At least he tried, I didn't see any of the others. Later they made a plan to get my youngest away from me and her future potentially outside the cult and into higher education, and I lost her too.
Ive tried OODAD, in various ways, like you, to reach out, to maintain our family relationships. I've received terrible, abusive emails and messages in response. One adult son is actually on this forum, pontificating about how wonderful he believes himself to be now that he's faded out. As a son he should be ashamed actually, but hey, that's his problem, not mine.
So I know about rejection, I understand the pain, I can relate to the injustices. It's so damn heartbreaking it doesn't have words. But you know what? I bet there are people in your life now who aren't cult damaged, who aren't sick, who can see and appreciAte you for the person you are. I hope that like me you allow them to love you and to fill your life with happiness. Your son may actually wake up and understand your love eventually, but if he doesn't, don't waste yourself. Love those who want to love you and enjoy.