by clarity 49 Replies latest jw friends

  • JeffT

    I've told my kids I want a viking funeral. With bagpipes. I know, the vikings didn't have bagpipes, that's OK, they didn't have what we call viking funerals either.

    Tom Paxton put it well (this song is frequently attributed to John Denver, who did a cover but didn't write it)

    Oh lay me down in Forest Lawn in a silver casket.
    Put golden flowers over my head in a silver basket.
    Let the drum and bugle corp blow taps while the cannons roar.
    And sixteen liveried employees pass out souvenirs from the funeral store
    I want to go simply when I go
    They'll give me a simple funeral there I know
    With a casket lined in fleece
    And fireworks spelling out "rest in peace."
    Oh take me when I'm gone to Forest Lawn
    Oh lay me down in Forest Lawn they understand there.
    And they have a heavenly choir and a military band there.
    Just put me in their care, I'll find my comfort there,
    With sixteen planes and a last salute, dropping a cross in a parachute.
    I want to go simply when I go.
    They'll give me a simple funeral there I know,
    With a hundred strolling strings
    And topless dancers with golden wings.
    Oh take me when I'm gone to Forest Lawn
    Oh, come, come, come, come,
    Come to the church in the wild wood.
    Kindly leave a contribution in the pail.
    Be as simple and as trusting as a child would,
    And we'll sell you the church in the dale.
    To find a simple resting place is my desire.
    To lay me down with a smiling face comes a little bit higher.
    My likeness done in brass, will stand in plastic grass,
    And weights and hidden springs tip it's hat to the mourners filing past.
    I want to go simply when I go.
    They'll give me a simple funeral there I know.
    I'll lie beneath the sand
    With piped in tapes of Billy Graham.
    Oh take me when I'm gone to Forest Lawn.
    Rock of ages cleft for me
    For a slightly higher fee.
    Oh take me when I'm gone to Forest Lawn.

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    I have made it clear that my funeral will not have JW influence and have specified a place and a female Pastor to officiate.

    Seeing as I was never supposed to die in This Wicked System of Things, it is OK for JWs carry their dead out of the church.

  • Botzwana

    Taliesin, We have to take away your apostate card since you do not know who Edward Dunlop is...

  • Aware!

    I don't want to have a funeral either. Instead, I want to be cremated, and like Quendi, I want to have an open house for friends. Don't think I'll have any family in the future. Can family visit an apostate's funeral? No one on my mom's side is a JW, so that's a possibility, but they live so far away. I won't be alive to know who went, anyway, so no hurt feelings. My chances of a funeral against my wishes are slim because I live a quiet life to myself.

  • clarity

    Good morning again (or goodnite?) ....sunny & warm here .... so back to the'funeral'


    I remember thinking 20 yrs ago (still in) that wow, I do NOT want the wt

    to have anything to do with my 'dying' at all!

    I did not want to be used as a mini commercial for the wt!

    I knew there was no elder who had any idea

    who I was (personally) or who even cared!

    Well ok, they did care when I handed in my time ...late!


    So black sheep ... I hear you.

    Hear you too Still!

    Found, we'd all raise our glasses to you!

    Cult .... perfect!

    jeffT would love bagpipes ... & the simple funeral!

    Aware, it's harsh to live alone sometimes, but good to have a say in our arrangements.


    Many thanks to all for joining in, Quendie, talesin and anyone else I've missed


  • Sulla

    I admit I don't get all this anti-funeral sentiment. I have already directed the vestments and casket style to be used (Trappists have a specialty in this). I'm leaning toward a simple, shaped casket made from pine -- though I am sensitive to the critique that over-simplicity is its own form of posturing: oh, look how humble I am. Anyway, that's up for discussion and I go back and forth.

    I have no question that the vestments must NOT be white. Black is the appropriate color for funerals and the recent trend toward white is really unfortunate. NO CELEBRATION OF LIFE! You share the funny stories during the wake, but the funeral is all Dies Irae and weeping. You point out that the deceased was aiming for Purgatory and everyone hopes that he made it.

    I have also instructed that my family follow my horse-drawn casket to the burial site, wearing black and barefoot. I admit this last instruction is somewhat controversial in the Sulla household and is most likely to be disregarded.

  • jgnat

    Whether you hate the idea of people fawning over you in death, or using the funeral as a platform for their personal agenda, please do your family a favour and spell out what you want. Thank you, Blondie, for gently reminding us of that.

    For a short time I helped families pick out their funeral plots. That brief experience taught me to join a local funeral association, and to go the way of cremation. Cremation saves bundles (space, money), and removes urgency. One could have a spring graveside memorial for instance, even if one dies in the middle of winter.

  • panhandlegirl

    Actually, I knew, but felt it was inappropriate to propagate hero-worship on this thread.

    And EXCUSE ME, but I was DF'd for apostacy in 1978/9 - can't remember the exact year, it was so long ago. So while YOU were still believing the LIE, I was living the reality of dismissing it. So what if some Bethelite had no funeral?

    Talesin, I actually do not know who Ed Dunlap or his brother is. I have heard Ed's name mentioned in connection with the 80's purge of apostates but that's all the info I have. I was out of the borg by '78, DF'D for apostacy sometime in the early 80's Like you, I don't remeber the exact year. Apparently it was not that important a date for me to remember. During and after that time, I was too busy rebuilding my life to know what was happening in the larger jw world.

    As for a funeral, I do want to be buried. Our family has thirty plots in the middle of the US where my husband and some of his family are already buried. I intend to live to be 100 so there might not be too many people left to attend my funeral. It would make me happy to have any who cared about me in life to have a big party with dancing and music as a send off for me. As others have stated, after I'm gone, I won't know what's happening anway so whatever my children do, is okay by me.

  • Open mind
    Open mind

    If you live in California and wish to donate your body, this registry is the most likely way for it to actually happen from everything I've read.

    What's the one document that EMT's go looking for the most? (And no smart asses saying the JW Advance Medical Directive please. )

    Driver's license. When you register with, it actually gets entered into the California DMV's data base so that as soon as Emergency Personnel run your driver's license, they will see you are a bonified organ donor. Minutes count in these situations and having an airtight, legal, authorization to throw your valuable parts on ice is key.

    I know someone whose job is counseling bereaving families who may be on the fence about it, to consider organ donation. It sounds like a horrific job, but she is an amazing woman. If I've ever met an "Empath", she's it.


  • MrFreeze

    The new world is going to come before I die anyway so why plan? seriously though, I don't want a funeral service. I'd rather be cremated than buried also.

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