Welcome BU2B. Good luck on your spiritual journey.
Greetings! My first post
by BU2B 56 Replies latest jw experiences
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skeeter1
Welcome!
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jemba
Welcome BU2B, there is some awesome advice here. I will use some of it on my parents.
My 2 cents worth is that when my Hubby came home with some 'apostate' info regarding 607/1914 I felt SICK, SCARED & DEFENSIVE. He left it a few weeks and mentioned a few other things, it was so hard to hear. However we had both been having doubts for years and had already faded so I told his workmate to get us more info, my Husband was mentally out a few months before me but my initial reaction may be worth noting.
My Husband did the best thing by leaving me to think about his bombshell for a few weeks before the next round of 'apostate' info.
Go easy, baby steps.
Well done, I wish you all the best.
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GeneM
Welcome welcome. You are very lucky in that your wife seems kind of cool with it all. Mine freaked out and is now my ex wife... I'm kind of new too, let us know if you need anything at all.
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Pams girl
Welcome, you are not alone...wishing you all you wish for yourself
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outsmartthesystem
Welcome! You and I are in the exact same position (except I am not a MS.....and have successfully faded). But it pains me so much to see my wife bury her head deeper into the sand and refuse to logically think. It also pains me to see her try so hard to indoctrinate the kids.
Feel free to PM me if you need to talk
If there is anything I've learned it is that a person is not going to see the truth about this organization until they are ready. the ONLY thing you can do is ask her thought provoking questions that may induce her to do some research. Whatever you do.....try not to engage her in direct uncomfortable questions, conversation or accusations (accusations against the WT of course). She has been trained to throw up a shield and protect her faith in the organization at all costs. Alas.....as Blacksheet mentioned.....her apostate alarm has already been set off. I fear that any future question you may ask her will automatically be interpreted as an attack on her faith and she will go into mental shut down mode like my wife.
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DesirousOfChange
If there is anything I've learned it is that a person is not going to see the truth about this organization until they are ready.
That is so true. When the scales first fell of my eyes and I began to see TTATT and had lost all fear of reading info from "apostate" sites, I was like a new JDub that trys to force-feed every member of their family. At that time my wife demanded I stop. She did NOT want to hear it. She also wanted me to NEVER read this or any anti-JW site again. It was all destroying me. It was destroying our marriage (surely I was planning to run off with some worldly or apostate hussie). It was going to destroy our family. Thus, I quieted down. But when a point in the WT or KM hit a chord, I'd just casually mention it. Did you notice this? Do you read it this way? What do you think? NO force-feeding.
Here we are a year later. Almost every WT study, SHE mentions the hypocrisy or double-speak in the article. She has issues with their slant on things or with their "total obedience" to WTS comparing it to obedience to Jesus or Jehovah or the Bible. Even if I've noticed the same point, I act as though I did not and ask her to show it to me so as to have a "WOW! You are right!" moment. She has come to see it is just men and men's opinions -- both locally and at the "top".
She's still hung up on the "Where else shall we go?" and "But who else is doing the preaching/witnessing work as Jesus commanded?" But no longer is there any argument in skipping a meeting for a special event or for a long weekend trip, etc. No longer is their the guilt for sleeping in on Sat or Sun morning. No longer is there the issue over R-rated movies. Occasionally even something a little stronger is fun.
Baby steps.
Doc
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jgnat
I read in your message, Desirous of Change, that the most critical separation from the society is the mental one. I agree it is so much more relaxed at home when I have my natural man about. I have him more and more. Yet, he stays loyal to the society for reasons that are very much his own. It is nice to hear him get fed up with the society over some small slight or another. They are really the best anti-witness a girl could hope for.