Hello - My story

by Sparlock 51 Replies latest jw friends

  • Sparlock

    I have been lurking on site for some days and thought I would share my story.

    I am a warrior wizard, who has had dealings with a Jehovah's Witness family. Reading through the posts here I realise that these people shun those those who have left the organisation, that is very sad. I was never even given the chance to become a member. I was in the house for less than a day and was disfellowshipped, by the bitch mother! Apparently without saying anything, I was deemed a bad influence, simply by being what I am, a plastic warrior wizard!

    My disfellowshipping was somewhat different to others described here. No elders, no Judicial, no appeal. I was simply DUMPED!! Yes thrown into a bin. Has anyone ever heard of this type of punishment before. Thankfully my magic powers enabled me to escape, I still smell of rotten carrot sticks, and my ego is battered, but I am OK.

    Anyway I am here now, and I hope you will you provide me with word of support.


  • Sparlock

    Who's bloody picture is that, and how do i change it?

  • elderelite


  • Pams girl
    Pams girl


    Welcome Sparlock, you are among friends here!

    Do you plan to visit Caleb in the future?

    What of the bin, what else was in there?

    Are there more of your kind?

    Do you have family still in?

    What, exactly, are your powers?

    Im looking forward to getting to know you!


  • Chariklo

    I knew it was only a matter of time!

    Welcome, Sparlock! Make yourself at home. Here you can live long and prosper!

  • jemba

    Welcome Sparlock. You are amongst friends here. I would like to offer you some words of advice.

    You firstly need to march yourself straight down to toys r us and find yourself either counsellor 'barbie' or psychiatrist 'barbie' you need to talk to someone. When you are feeling better make sure you get yourself another magic wand, you will find this in the harry potter aisle. Next step would be to make some good worldly friends, Im thinking papa smurf - you will find him in aisle 6 - soft toys. Papa smurf will advise you no doubt to head straight to the KH to have a chat with the elders, the smurfs find the best time to catch them is when the meeting is in full swing. I strongly advise you and Caleb to have a chat to Steve and Selma, often a victim of violence can lash out at others, I think you were Selmas whipping boy that day she made Caleb bin you. I think Woody and Buzz may be able to help you with Selmas bullying, remember the bully that lived next door to them? Yeah he got his just desserts.

    All the best for your future in the world of the occult Sparlock. Just remember we are all here for you.

    Love Jemba

  • jemba

    btw.... Im thinking you might have a lot in common with our resident wizard here....WTWizard. PM him if you like, Im sure he wont mind. I heard the elders put him in the dumpster.

  • Sparlock

    Hi Jemba - Great advice except one thing.

    Papa Smurf hates me too. You can see from my photo, I took one of his beloved smurfettes and showed her a life of depravity.

  • oompa

    damm you sparlock!!! i wanted that name!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1......................oompa

  • Sparlock

    My name makes Jehovah Sad! You don't want to make Jehovah sad, do you Oompa?

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