So I had the elders come to my house about two months at the time I told my wife and family that I was having doubts. They came by I explained my position and they basically told me I needed to be more humble and just tow the line like many others have before me. Well I have not gone preaching or to any meeting for two months after that and did not recieve any phone call from the elders, which was fine by me . Suddenly the other one of the elders calls me, but I do not answer and he eventually sends me a text message that they will like to visit me with the C.O. just wondering if any of you have had these visits and how did you handle it? How would you prepare?
C.O. Is coming this week
by Freeof1914 24 Replies latest jw friends
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notjustyet
"I appreciate the offer but I'm going to pass on that for now but I will call you if and when I am ready to talk about it, thanks for your concern", (click)
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OnTheWayOut
To add to what NJY said, start with "The elders have already been very helpful." They might just move along to someone else. Brush the elders off continually with "I am fine. I will call if I need to."
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NVR2L8
JNY and OTWO are right...I just did what they suggested and I have been left alone.
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Honesty
They are going to ask you the loyalty question.
See them if you want to be DF'd.
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Alfred
I had a similar situation about 2 years ago... long story short: the CO was informed that I was perturbed over the Watchtower's handling of the 1975 fiasco... (but that was really only a small part of it). Anyway, the CO showed up with about 5 WT articles he had printed from the WT Library... Everytime he started to read one, I'd cut him off to let him know that "I read that already"... having no other printed material in front of him, he became stumped and looked to the elder to save his ass but the elder just sat there with a blank look on his face.
Then... wait for it... you guessed it... they both went into the usual "who preaches worldwide, which doesn't participate in wars and who doesn't believe in the trinity" routine (their comfort zone), without acknowledging that the 1975 fiasco was a direct result of totally improvised doctrine that had no Biblical basis whatsoever...
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breakfast of champions
No thanks. That's all you have to say. Say nothing else.
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red21
I took the fade approach. I was an MS that stepped down. At the same time, there was a congregation split into different halls and locations. I had a few show up, usually some brother I had never met and maybe another I did know. I would listen to them politely but just tell them that I have allot on my plate right now and tell them I apprecated their visit. Of course, I never went to a meeting. I also think it helped that we split because I think I got lost in the seperation of halls! Eventually, they stopped coming by and unless I see some brother or sister in public (which rarely happens), I have managed to float under the radar. Now, I don't hesitate to tell them that I am inactive, and throw out a few personal tragedies that have happened and say hello/goodbe with some polite chit-chat thrown in. I did like many of the friends, so I have nothing against them. If I see a DF'd person, I walk right up to them now and say hello, that I miss seeing them, wish them the best, and ask them about how their life is going. That makes me feel good about myself. They are usually unsure for a moment since they do not know my status, but they quickly see that I am no longer part of the congregation. Some of them are even facebook friends that I keep in touch with now. That is how I handled it.
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Disillusioned Lost-Lamb
The CO is just a dude who cracks down on the elderberreis.
He instructs them to whip you into shape and a meat-ing with the next level slave abuser would, in their minds, do the trick.
Depending on whether you want to stay "in" or go out, you can respectfully decline (as others have mentioned here), meet and kiss major ass, meet and be truthful or tell them to f*ck off (the latter two will get you DF).
Another thought:
Since they want to use middle management, is there any reason why they don't want to lose you? (Money, free labor/privileges, need brothers, etc.) If you want be crafty, it may be the only opportunity you'll get to make them beg; this must be meticulously planned and can involve some ass kissing with the possibility of a major backfire, but if you don’t care about being DF have some fun with it.
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Freeof1914
Greta suggestions the only problem is my wife is still a hardcore witness so she pleaded with me to allow them to come. I agreed so I am almost forseeing a comitee taking place after this meeting. Altough my trump card is that I have not shared my thoughts with anyone including my wife, and my father who has been an elder for many years says a comittee can only be formed if i begin spreading my ideas. So I guess we shall see howit plays out. Thanks for all the suggestions. Truth be told there is no way I am going to kow tow to an elder and co, I have no respect as far as having any authority over my life, I am expecting an awkward tense meeting with no resolution.