Welcome to the board! My parents used to live in Alaska for few years, how cold is it in your area now? brrrrrrrrrr!
Another day, another apostate. Here's my story.
by I Want to Believe 49 Replies latest jw experiences
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Rabbit
I saw this on Braingle today:
Vocabulary :: Word of the Day : Apostate
a-pos-tate
noun :: One who abandons long-held religious or political convictions.
"Ha-ha--I'm awfully glad you have made an apostate of me all the same." -- Thomas Hardy It's all good. Don't worry...be happy ! -
Sherilynn
Thank you for sharing your story. Yes when you start this journey finding your own truth it can be quite amazing and confusing all the same.
Take it easy with your wife and let her come at her own speed. I have faded since 2004 after realizing that I could not believe a God would be so happy to kill every man, woman, and child for not being a Jehovah Witness (as the assembly speaker so proudly annouced) that was the beginning of my search and finding the literature I had read confirmed it all (in one ear and out the other just have your butt in that kingdom hall seat to prove your spirituality). I have found that worldly people are very kind and realized how in my zealous years I was really quite arrogant in thinking I knew so much about the bible when in fact I knew very little other than the snippets feed through the Watchtower. Now I do like researching religions and spirituality, although I will never be a member of any organized religion I have a deeper spirituality and I am a more giving person than I was ever in my 20+ years as a witness. Also my marriage is so much better and stronger, my husband was the patient one after all.
I truly believe it is important to keep up on the changes as I use the information to bring out points and ask questions should I run into a JW, but of course my home is a do not call and they do leave me alone. Never did they seek to help me as a lost sheep other than a little at first and when I had my questions and JW literature it really did scare them away. The ones that I cared about came and we talked but they could not refute what I showed them and it really came down to they did not want to make waves in their own lives so they just faded away from me. You know they are really the ones with a foundation built on shifting sands.
It will get better just keep a positive attitude, keep in prayer and build on your own spirituality wherever that may lead you. Some friends and family will follow in due time, maybe not at first but you will see your move will move others as well, the ones important to you will be watching your example, try to stay away from anger (very hard to do at first when you really realize how we were lied to) but be firm and read the many books and sites that you will find here.
Peace and love
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jamiebowers
Welcome! I know I have ex-jw Facebook friends in Alaska, but I can't for the life of me remember their names. I'll do some checking, and send you a pm when I find someone.
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I Want to Believe
Mind Blown:" Has anyone noticed the amount of new ones flocking to JWN "as of late"?! Growing each day!"
My cong. had a couple more df's in the last few months. I really knew I was on the way out when those announcements didn't make me sad.
Ziddina: I loved The X-Files! If I could figure out how to change my avatar here it would be to Mulder. Any episode that hinted at spirits was turned off, but when it was aliens and monsters it was okay to watch.
Iamallcool: It's been in the single/negative digits for 2 months now, which is an unusually long cold spell for Anchorage.
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Billy the Ex-Bethelite
Welcome! Thanks for sharing your story.
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Black Sheep
Welcome to the forum IW2. I hope you enjoy your time here.
Chris
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smiddy
That was a great post,I`m sure you will enjoy your journey here.WELCOME
smiddy
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AgentSmith
Welcome
Looking forward to more of your posts.
Agent Smith
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jambon1
I had more or less all of the same feelings as yourself.
I would say that I have always been careful not to 'go off the rails' which plays right into the hands of active JW's. It was hard. I battled with heavy drinking. The mental gymnastics that I had endured for around ten years had had it's effect on me and despite the feelings of freedom and relief, the manner in which you are treated by your family and JW friends takes it's toll. I'm positive that I went through a degree of post-traumatic stress disorder after I left the reigion. The mental scars from having their constant negativity drummed into my brain were signifiant. Being emotionally distant and socially detatched from those I cared for also had a very negative effect on me. However, like I say, I saw the benefit to being sensible and not indulging myself too much in bitterness and regret. Although, it was a battle which often I would lose, back in the beginning.
I really enjoyed making friends or reconnecting with friends in the world. It taught me that although there are arseholes everywhere (none moreso than within the JW religion), generally people are not evil, bad or wicked. I used discernment when making worldly friends and after six years of being out of the org, I have a lovely mixture of friends who I care for deeply.
I have enjoyed doing voluntary work for a charity in recent months, which is very rewarding and brings more to the table than my other work which is very mundane, although financially it is very rewarding. It has been nice to be back in the workplace among people and it's super to be involved with people who are genuinely caring individuals. I would never have entertained this as a vocation had I still been a JW. This work has offered a lot of opportunities to me in terms of future work and new friendships.
Occasionally, I am in the company of JW's. Despite relaxing my view on them as individuals, I do find that their manner and general conversation is odd, negative and generally just not my cup of tea. As much as they may be nice individual people, I struggle with the fact that these same people would shun their children or make life and death decisions for their kids (given the chance), based on a notion of faith. Also, the general 'one-upmanship' is a massive factor. It's horrible to be around people who make judgements on appearance.
All the best to you on your journey. Stick in.
J