Hello--new to the witnesses...and you (page 3)

pbrow

lkm,

Ill tell you what I tell everyone who is out but has kids in the "truth" with an ex or believing mate. You cannot afford to go back in and fade if you have kids that are in. You cannot afford to pretend that the witness way of life is the normal way of life. Your children will suffer if you go back in and then fade. Get your kids involved in sports, school activities and anything else you can think of. Show your children that a normal, balanced approach to life is better than the bubble that the wintesses try to raise their children in. If you go in and fade, then birthdays are still evil, christmas is still evil, saying bless you is still evil, sports are still evil. If you question whether they are evil you are right back to square one. So dont go back, show your kids first hand that these things are not evil by allowing them to participate in as many as possible. Give them the proper balance and critical thinking skills and the other parent and effed up meetings will do the rest to destroy the bubble. Meetings can serve a purpose, if your kids are getting the proper balance then the meetings will actually help you. Believe me it works!!

pbrow

cyberjesus

a lot of comments here... everybody has an opinion..... why are you going alone? I dont get that. if he needs to get reinstated you dont have to go at all. period

OneDayillBeFree

Hahaha oh YOUR god dear!

Really Watery?... I mean Teary?

You wanna do this again?? Haha cause OneDay's all ready to go! You just say the word LKM (or any other poster here) and good ol' OneDay(thats me btw LKM) Here will Have a nice discussion so you can see how the defendants -NOT witnesses *wink wink* (that means you Oberono) of the great LOVING and overflowing with truth and perfection organization of the watchtower bible and track society of new York's true colors shine!

Oh and by the way LKM I'm still an active witness. Born in. Top of my class! An elite if you could say! Regular pioneer and ministerial servant, and everything else in between. I'd give you more proof but unfortunately that's as good as it's going to get for now. But if you stick around long enough you may actually get to see me become free!

Oh and welcome LKM I hope the best for you and your boyfriend!(: and remember, witness or Buddhist, Mormon or apostate, athiest or thiest we all have feelings, we all want to be loved, treated equally and we are all just doin what we think is right even though sometimes it may be wrong so hang on in there! And never give up!!

sizemik

Teary says this . . .

And the distortions and unsupported assumptions begin almost immediately after posting. . . . Teary Oberon

But then Teary also says this . . .

they are all disgruntled ex-Witnesses with axes to grind. . . . Teary Oberon

you aren't going to find anything helpful or positive here. . . . Teary Oberon

listen to these posters and end up destroying your relationship and making your life miserable. . . . Teary Oberon

the prevalence of silver tongued wolves in sheep's clothing like yourself. . . . Teary Oberon

. . . a lot of distortions and unsupported assumptions Teary? . . .

Oh dear . . . there's a word for that I believe.

Here's a suggestion for you LKM . . .

Click on Teary Oberons name . . . this takes you to his member page. Then check out the "topics posted on" and read some of the threads . . . this will give you a much better idea of what you're in for.

jwfacts

Welcome LKM. It sounds like you know what you are doing and have a good understanding of what to expect. How similar have you found the Watchtower practices to Assemblies of God, which people generally label a high control religion as well?

Do you really need to go to meetings in order to help your boyfriend get reinstated? He will have a hard time getting reinstated, since he is dating a non-believer, plus they will assume you are "living in sin." I can't imagine the elders looking too favourably on the situation until the two of you are married so if you start going now to meetings you will be going for a long time before he gets reinstated. I would recommend you keep away from the meetings until you are married, and even then your meeting attendance may not really help the process too much unless they really think you are going to convert.

IsaacJ22

I would like to suggest that you don't really have to do this at all. Whether you go to meetings or not should have no real impact on his chances for reinstatement. Going to meetings won't help you get along with his family...they'll badger you and look down on you either way unless you convert. I don't think he's really thought this one through.

But as others have said, be prepared to be badgered about a Bible study. Not only at meetings but by his family as well. It could get aggressive and even ridiculous.

I suggest you point out bad behavior from Witnesses when it goes too far. Site the fact that you're being nice and they are not. Then you can disappear for a while at a time after they act like jerks and rightfully claim that it's their attitude that's the problem, not yours. Make sure he understands what you're going through as well. Maybe he'll realize that this isn't a good plan for you and that, in the long run, it won't help him earn anyones approval either.

I was wondering about the same things regarding Assemblies of God as jwfacts, BTW. :-) I had the same impression about them.

finallysomepride

Welcome LKM

Two very important words: Stay Away

Keep coming here & also visit www.jwfacts.org

there so many good comments already, so can't really add to them.

FSP

OnTheWayOut

Oh, the thoughts here are far left and far right. They are mostly fine thoughts. Everybody follows a different path, and things work out differently for different people and at different Kingdom Halls.

I see good balance in what you and your man are trying. He wants to talk with family and you want to try to make his reinstatement a bit smoother by going to the KH.

If you are living together, that's hindering his reinstatement. I would totally deny that if possible, also deny any premarital sex. These people don't need to know everything.

I also agree that you don't need to go to the KH. But I get why you do. Still, I would not bother ever going without him.

It would be a good idea to "put off" their offers of studying the Bible with you. If you are there to help him, I wouldn't outright say I wasn't interested, just that it is a bit early on for you to consider that.

jean-luc picard

Hello and welcome LKM.

As ABibleStudent said

A MUST READ:

Steven hassan:-combatting cult mind control.

Make no mistake; mind control is what they're into.

Quandry

Welcome to the forum.

Does your boyfriend have access to his son? If not, can't he go to court to have shared custody? During his time with his son, he should take him various places, depending on his age, to help him see life. Museums, shows, art, sports, travel,etc. He should help him to see that he has his own choices in life to make.

The posters are correct about you going to the meetings. It will not make it easier for the b.f. to get reinstated, and may make it harder-they will see you as the source of his sin and will definetely want you two to break up until marriage.

You are in a tough place, and a no-win situation. Please don't lose yourself and your individuality in trying to please everyone else, especially when we all can assure you won't please the JWs in any event.

Hello--new to the witnesses...and you

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