Went to my first meeting today anonymously!

by TimothyT 48 Replies latest watchtower bible

  • troubled mind
    troubled mind

    ((((((TIM))))))) ......that is a hug for you . I do know what you mean . I was raised as a witness for 44 yrs then walked away . At first I really needed to belong to something ,to feel a sense of spiritual community . When I left I still believed in God and the Bible . A friend invited me to her church and I attended for a while . It was a wonderful experience . It was what I needed at the time ,a transition period . After a while I just felt my needs and beliefs changed and I no longer needed that kind of reinforcement .

    Why not start going to a different place of worship every weekend ? See for yourself what they believe and teach .

    I know it was a good experience for me to see for myself other Christians were not anything like the Watchtower described them to be . The Church I went to was encouraging ,Bible based ,and very warm and friendly .

    It is all a new education for yourself go out there and LEARN ! It takes time to adjust and to leave a way of life you have been use to for over twenty years . Give yourself time .

  • Bucholz

    I would say you're suffering from a nasty case of Stockholm Syndrome.

  • Diest

    Tim it is hard to get away from the thinking that the bible is the only place for morality. I think what really helps me is that what has pushed most modern countries forward was not the bible, it is secular writers. If we only looked to the bible then I could own a slave! How is that for moral? Not to mention its position on women and gays.

    Overall there are many different places you can look to for a spiritual message.

    So unless you want to own a slave, opress some women, and judge all fornicators, it might be healthier to find a new book.

  • J. Hofer
    J. Hofer

    just today my wife went to her once-in-two-months meeting. my long time best friend with his wife was there. we got along really well, and i thought both of them would still be good friends of mine. well, he still is i guess, but her... she told my wife that she can't visit us, because of me. and i'm not even disfellowshipped or something. but treatet the same non the less. i used to think she was really nice. and she owes me loads of favours...

    just a little reminder. that's those nice people you are talking about. they are nice as long as you are their kind.

  • Jackals

    Hi guys, Jack here. I am Tim's boyfriend and had never attended a meeting before today. I went along with Tim to listen to the talk and see what they had to say.

    Overall the experience was nice, the people were welcoming, we listened to the talk (I understand it is sometimes a skewed JW view, but accept on occasions it can be interesting debate too). One of the things I did say was that, as the talk is given by JWs, the answers are given by JWs, the literature is produced by JWs etc., for someone like me it is very hard to differentiate between that's true bible teaching and what is their take on things! From that perspective I can see how newly "recruited" JWs can find it hard to identify these differences also.

    When walking away I did say to Tim "Yea it was lovely, but the only reason they were so welcoming and nice is because we had to lie and pretend to just be friends. I don't think we should have to hide who we are in order to go into the meeting which are supposedly open to the public after all. I did suggest to Tim that we seek alternative methods of gaining this insight i.e. there must be some gay bible groups, or just a gathering of random people who will accept us for who we are. The fact that we had to lie from the minute we walked through the door kind of negated any of the positive things that came out of the meeting. I'm not ashamed of who I am and shouldn't have to hide it in order to find a place to study the bible.

    Tim is not interested in joining back with the JWs, he knows why this isn't feasible however he spent 20+ years receiving his bible knowledge from this group and I can't blame him for seeking this same avenue to continue his learning.

    I think if we did go back to this meeting again, I would suggest to Tim that we cut out the pretense, say we're gay and listen to the talk regardless. Yea they probably won't be so friendly anymore but would we care? Our primary reason for attending is for the talk.

    Thanks for all the comments guys, we appreciate it and I agree with the suggestions that we seek alternative methods of learning from the bible. I couldn't say anything about the meetings until I had been to one myself.

    Nugget, you'd better get some coffee in too, Tim sometimes is partial to one of them too ;)

    Lots of love,


    P.S. Yes they did give me a copy of "What does the bible REALLY teach" and no I won't be reading it ;)

  • TimothyT

    Hi everyone,

    Thanks for your responses.

    When the brother on my Judicial committee called me last Wednesday and told me that im going to be disfellowshipped this Thursday, I said to myself: Cool... well that means that ill be able to go to the meetings from then on, listen to the spiritual talk and go away and get no hassle whatsoever. Despite the fact that I quite enjoyed today, your comments have really driven home to me that the people in the org, although some may be very nice, they wont agree with me (as has already been proven), hence i see no point in bothering with them anymore. I have just decided that i wont make a conscious effort to go to any more JW meetings.

    In other news, my Sunday mornings from now on will be used to try out different churches. HEHE!!! Im gonna get a little clipboard and make notes on my faves and mark them out of 10! HAHA!!! I hope that i can find somewhere that not only accepts and welcomes us for who we are, but also can provide some sort of stimulating spiritual discussion, etc.

    Thanks for all your comments. I hope you all understand, this was simply about me wanting to continue my spirituality after being disfellowshipped. Thanks for helping me to open my eyes in this regard.

    Timmy Tucker :D

  • NewChapter

    Enjoy your sundays. Sounds fun.

  • mrsjones5

    Have fun Tim...gosh for some reason I felt like calling you Timmy.

    You seem like such a sweet guy and I so happy you found such a good man who would step inside a hall with you after all you've gone through (there's no way my hubby will ever step foot in a hall again and I can't say that I don't blame him).

    Anywhoo, love your posts and keep them coming.


  • journey-on

    Hi, Jack and Tim....Just as an experiment, go back next week. At the end of the meeting, pick one of the elder's wives. Pick the friendliest, most welcoming one. Take her aside and ask her if you may talk to her confidentially. Then tell her that everyone is soooo loving and kind, and that last week you were hesitant to reveal that you are both gay, but now you think you have found a real spiritual "home". It won't be ten minutes after you leave, that she will gossip to the entire congregation.

    After that conversation, see what true colors they're made of.

  • sabastious

    You guys are playing with fire. Both of you seem to be yearning, not for spirituality alone, but spirituality coupled with community. Yes, you can get some Bible topics to think about by going to a meeting, but as the OP stated you were love bombed which is a temptation.

    Think of it like a theme park that appears legit, but actually has extreme fundamental flaws in their ride designs. You enter the theme park with the intention of having fun, because that's what theme parks are for. You know that their rides can be dangerous, you know that countless people have died, or have been injured, on them before and no design changes have been made, but still you still pay admission to get in and observe. You'll be around people who have no idea of the danger they are in and have the intention of getting you to go on rides with them because... they are in a theme park and they are laughing and having a great time.

    Get community from somewhere else, imo, and get spirituality from groups that are open minded and tolerant. There is no reason to go back to that theme park, it just isn't worth it.

    Of course that's just my opinion.


Share this