by What Now? 50 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
I've heard this statement several times while I was a JW. My sympathy is with anyone who WANTED children, but didn't have them because of the Borg's mind control.
When I first got married I didn't want to have children "in a divided household". About a month later, I stopped going to meetings and have since reconsidered my decision. Four years later I'm pregnant with my first child. I'm happy and anxious at the same time, like any other expectant mother.
DO NOT have children in this system!!
This was just one aspect of the WTS's enforced exploitation on wanting people to circulate their literature
(pioneer) or work within their printing establishments.
People who have children cant spend time in the door to door work or do other volunteer work at the branch offices.
The master wants his slaves to work with diligence and proficiency.
it must suck to be elderly and not have adult offspring provide assistance.
On the other hand, if you didn't have offspring, you could probably afford to pay for the kind of assistance you need, without having to lay guilt trips on anyone.
My youngest's present attitude has me rather terrified of the kind of old age home she'd pick for me.
Thinking the world has gone to hell in a handbasket and that things aren't as wonderful as they were back in the good ol' days, is a phenomenon that happens to people beginning in their late fourties (if they let it) when they are old enough to look back on their lives and see them nostalgically and gloss over the problems of yesteryear. They put on rose colored glasses whenever they cast their eyes back to their youths but they don darkly tinted ones when they gaze into the scary uncertain future. Every generation thinks the next one in line has a future fraught with woe. It was old guys who wrote the Bible and it's old guys who write the Watchtower. Doom and gloom is how they are feeling and consequently that is all they see and that is likely because they are dissatisfied with themselves and dissapointed about something. It's easier to blame something outside themselves than to realize they didn't live up to their own expectations.
Somehow the majority of Witnesses can go from door to door telling people that the world is about to end yet at the same time go on having children, having baby showers, asking the parents of newlyweds if they are hoping to have grandchildren soon. Most of the young ones, thanfully, still haven't had all the sparkle rubbed off their young lives by these grumpy old ones, hard as they may have tried. The ever present hope of youth hasn't been vanquished entirely and although their JW mouths are chanting the doom and gloom speak of their leaders, instinct and hope wins out in the end and babies are born. Life goes on, people always find a way to manage, children grow up and look back on their childhoods with fondness no matter how bad their grandparents say things have gotten.
My boys grew up in the 80's and 90's. I've often heard them talking fondly about thier school days and childhood experiences. Yet when I graduated from High School in 1975 the earth wasn't supposed to be inhabitable if the System of things didn't come to and end immediately. Jacques Cousteau predicted the the oceans would be void of all life by the end of the decade and oh how the Witnesses loved hearing things like that. In 1969 my Mother was pregnant with my youngest sister. A cargroup of Sisters came to visit her and basically scared the joy out of her with all the "woe to those suckling a baby" doom and gloom. That was 42years ago.
My oldest Son and his wife want to have a child soon. The grumpy old man in me wants to warn them off the idea but the wise old man in me knows that life will go on and youth and energy will not be stopped. Why spoil the newness of life for them just because I am beginning to feel a bit tired and things aren't as rosy as I remember them?
Really, this formulated impressed social behavior that the WTS was trying to imply to its devoted members,
was nothing but mind manipulation, with a element of fear induced phobia to persuade people to keep working for the WTS.
Thats what it was all about.
Power, control and money.
I am 54 yo and my brother is 55. I remember my mother saying that she received a number of judgmental statements about why you would have children this close to the end of the system. Many of my parent's contemporaries died of old age childless.
I know of an elder and wife couple now in their 50's who are childless. They were 2nd generation and rec'd a lot of pressure from parents and the cong to not have kids. They finally decided to try when she was in her mid-forties. All that resulted was one miscarriage. They are good-hearted and generous people. Breaks my heart what this "faith" does to lives.
Oh my....did I hear "Don't have children in this system of things" over & over & over & over. My mother truly hated her children on a deep level. They dragged her down, sapped her energy, kept her chained, etc.
So, when my spouse and I were to have a baby....we took my parents to a nice restaurant to tell them and celebrate. My mother was ANGRY about it absolute cow. It was a "How could you? Are you nuts? Their going to ruin your life. End of this System is close. You want to try to take care of a baby during Armegheddon? Worst possible time to ever have a baby..." My spouse and I went home and cried.
After a long cry, we decided that my mother was nuts and her religion was nuts. I had distanced myself a long time before then, but then really distanced myself from my mother. I had not figured out what a cult was or that the JWs were a cult - but something was super strange and I didn't want that negativity toxic persons around me or my family.
Skeeter
p.s. We now have two children and couldn't be happier non-JWs!
My decision to not have children has nothing to do with religion. I see kids in restaurants, theaters, stores, etc having meltdowns and I want no part of that. I have a hard time relating to children. I can't seem to communicate well with them.
I am currently aboard an Amtrak train. There is a young kid fussing and making all sorts of loud shrieks and noise. It's pretty much the audible equivalent of having a frozen dishrag drug through my urethra. I understand that it's a baby and it can't help it, but that doesn't make it any easier on my ears.
Until recently, my wife has agreed with me on the not having children decision, however, her sister had a baby girl 2 months ago and I can sense that this has caused a change in her thinking. My niece is a cute little thing, but at the end of the day, I'm glad that I'm not the one who has to stay up all night trying to placate a crying infant. It seems that once you have a child, your life as you know it just shuts down. No more impromtu fly fishing trips on the weekends or for a couple of hours after work. No more jumping up at a moment's notice to go grab some happy hour food and a beer with your wife at the local watering hole. Sure, it may sound selfish, but these are things that we enjoy doing together.
Another problem is that kids get older and become teenagers. It has been my observation that MOST teenagers are disresepctful, crazed little punk-asses. I don't really like the idea of having some snotty psychopath living in my house either.
I'm sure if I did have a child, I would love and cherish them and they would get my full attention and care. i would just like to avoid the negative stuff that comes along with it.
I rejoice when I see a rebellous teenager - that is a normal, healthy brain that is deciding a course of independence and leaving his parents. Kids are messy and spill things - but so have I. I spill stuff all the time.
Yes, you can't do impromptu fishing alone or have a "boy's weekend" out...
but, you do have a little buddy to go fishing with, to go see Transformers with, to throw a softball with, and to share your world. For me, I didn't want to be "too old" to have kids and say, "I never had a kid for which to teach and share life with."
If you try to see the good in others, you will begin to see the good in you.
Skeeter
