nic ,, I know how much you love yr brother, this must be so hard.
Recently (several months ago), my parents and I fell out, and never again will I be spoken to. Even tried calling a few weeks ago,, ugh. It's tough as they are both sick, but I have PUT UP WITH THEIR CRAP FOR 35 YEARS!!!!!!!!!!!! Only now that it's over I am finally feeling the emotional fallout - mostly anger, right now, but it will progress thru the 5 stages and soon,,, acceptance will be complete.
Don't let it go that long, nic,,, rip off the bandaid!
Though it's been tough, I am relieved I no longer have to listen to their crap about the kingdumb hell, their shocked looks when I say 'lucky', etc. etc. I'm starting to live for myself, FINALLY.
From the movie Farewell to the King, I say to YOU -------> LIFE, ENGLISH!!!
just my 2 ,,, and whatever you do, all the best