Sex at 14?

by headisspinning 71 Replies latest jw friends

  • moshe
    moshe
    Someone needs to talk to him about the risks.

    I wonder if they sell condoms, too? Well , so much for worrying about one of your boys becoming a JW and shunning you.

    -

  • Iconoclast
    Iconoclast

    prophecor - You know what's too funny? I'm an Art History major and from what I've learned through the ages, nothing's changed. Instead of TV, the Romans had sculpture and sex slaves (which boys were required to partake at a certain age to reach manhood, usually very young). Instead of porn magazines, the Roccoco period had paintings of women that a gyno would need to study and had Klimt that drew women masterbating. The subject hasn't changed. Just the medium :)

  • jamiebowers
    jamiebowers

    Don't panic....14 seems to be about the average age for losing virginity. You don't have to approve or disapprove of his actions, because he's going to do what he wants to in this regard. Just make it clear to him that sex isn't free of responsibility or heartache, and be there for him regardng both.

  • garyneal
    garyneal

    Wow, $3.00 / gallon gas, Moshe. I need to stop by there and fill up both my vehicles.

  • CoonDawg
    CoonDawg

    Yep, just be honest with him about your concerns and the risks. Let him know that he has to be smart about his sexual activity. Permissiveness isn't the greatest thing...if he's in a committed relationship (as committed as a 14 year old can be). Make sure he knows you love him and care for him but that this is a big step into the adult world that he thinks he's ready for.

  • prophecor
    prophecor

    Not a history major Iconoclast but I agree 100 percent. Sex is one of those things we get handed to us as human beings. It's a package deal and it's been the same, for forever. We all reached a certain age and all of a sudden, the lights go out. They've been going out from the begining of time. My only wish is that someone would have shared how 1 unbridled moment of passion with the one you were only going to spend 6 months of your life with, would show me the future forty years into the story so I could U-Turn from the hassles. Baby Momma Drama, supeonas for child support, arguements to no end because the thrill is gone. I too well understand only now the words of Lemuel's Mother to The King in Proverbs 31.

    Proverbs 31 (The Message)

    Proverbs 31
    Speak Out for Justice

    1 The words of King Lemuel, the strong advice his mother gave him:

    2-3 "Oh, son of mine, what can you be thinking of!
    Child whom I bore! The son I dedicated to God!
    Don't dissipate your virility on fortune-hunting women,
    promiscuous women who shipwreck leaders.

    4-7 "Leaders can't afford to make fools of themselves,
    gulping wine and swilling beer,
    Lest, hung over, they don't know right from wrong,
    and the people who depend on them are hurt.
    Use wine and beer only as sedatives,
    to kill the pain and dull the ache
    Of the terminally ill,
    for whom life is a living death.

    8-9 "Speak up for the people who have no voice,
    for the rights of all the down-and-outers.
    Speak out for justice!
    Stand up for the poor and destitute!"

  • poopsiecakes
    poopsiecakes

    Wow that son of yours sure didn't let grass grow under his feet!

    Great advice here - be there, don't freak out and make sure he's prepared.

    A hug for you on Mothers Day

  • Band on the Run
    Band on the Run

    14 was the norm for marriage during Middle Ages so physically, we can do it. Society has changed and it is very destructive towards self-esteem. Pregnancy is hell at this age. It will end so many avenues in which he could grow. Their brains are not fully developed. I don't believe the expression everyone else is doing it. He is not everyone else. Rather, he is your precious son.

    A silly way of asserting independence. Yet how do you tell a teen they are wrong? Life will teach him. Teen society is very sick in so many ways. Yet my generation was signaled out for vitriol b/c of the Beatles, drugs, rebellion. I believe sex is a minor manifestation of a larger self image problem. How can he afford his first car if she becomes pregnant? Will they take the baby to the prom?

    Another factor is that chances are you will raise any baby, not them. They have no right to do this to you. Condoms are not fool proof.

  • anniegirl76
    anniegirl76

    Forgive me for not being quite on top of it all, are you JW as well? Is your son wanting to move back in with you?

  • cyberjesus
    cyberjesus

    14 and had sex already? Why did he have sex? his body wanted it? the girl wanted it? I think you should worry more about the reason why he did it and then decide what to do.

    If he wanted to experiment, he must know that is against the law and its consequences. He can become a father.. can he afford it? is he ready to work raise a kid?

    I dont see anything wrong with a human being having sex at the age he wants to have sex... as long as they are prepared to face the consequences of the act.... does he know them?

    Its better to have you on his side regardless if you like it or not than him doing things behind your back. He needs you.

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