My mom throws a not so subtle threat my way

by JWinprotest 33 Replies latest jw friends

  • JWinprotest

    My fade is going well, but my mom knows full well what my thoughts are on the WTS. It seems that she feels comfortable just ignoring the situation in order to keep seeing her grandchildren.

    The other day however we were talking about someone we know who is making it very difficult for her parents to see their grandchild.

    Then out of the blue, my mom turns in my direction and says, that if any of her kids try to deny her from seeing her grandchildren, she would take them to court and get a court order to force them to let her see them.

    I know what the message was, and it was loud and clear. She is letting me know that if I get disfellowshipped there's no way I can keep the kids away from her. I pretended like I didn't understand, but I did say, well what if the son moves his family to the other side of the country, what good would your court order do then? The room was silent for about 30 long seconds.

    Needless to say, this conversation has planted another seed of worry in my head. Not sure if anyone here has gone through this situation, but would any court allow unsupervised visitation for grandparents, even though it is their choice to shun the parents of the grandchildren?

  • Tuesday

    Just smile and nod, grandparents don't have rights to visitation. Especially if the parent feels the children being with the grandparents are detrimental.

  • Paralipomenon

    I'm no lawyer but I've never heard of a court ordered visitation for anyone other than parents.

  • LV101

    grandparents do not have RIGHTS according to my husband (lawyer) --- can't remember what he said about california, but i don't think so even though they have grandparents day or something. it's more of a holiday idea. you are the parent and it's your decision who/where/why they will spend time with.


  • chickpea

    it doesnt appear that grandparents, unless they lived with the child
    or have been a care giver as a de facto parent, have much of a case
    for visitation rights... as my hub would say "she is blowing sparks out
    her @ss......."

  • mrsjones5

    but would any court allow unsupervised visitation for grandparents, even though it is their choice to shun the parents of the grandchildren?


  • Sapphy

    Turn the threat back. Say you think a relationship with grandparents is really important for your kids, BUT that you would never allow anyone who abuses you by shunning or emotional blackmail to maintain a relationship with your kids. You wouldnt want your children to be taught that shunning and emotional blackmail are good tools to use in human relationships.

  • zoiks

    Oh wow, my mother did the same exact thing to me over the phone. It was in the midst of a hysterical rant about my obvious evil nature.... "Don't you dare take my grandchildren away from me! We will sue for grandparents' rights!"

    The funny thing is that I had never even considered limiting their access to my kids...until then.

    You really have nothing (legal) to worry about.

  • journey-on

    Wow. I have mixed feeling about your mom's words. Some posters on this board are heartbroken because their parents aren't interested in being grandparents to their children. It warms my heart to hear that she loves them so much she would never forsake them.

  • LotusFlower1

    This made me laugh. Grandparents cannot sue for visitation rights. LoL.

    However, hopefully you impress upon her that, if you are disfellowshipped , IT IS HER CHOICE TO SHUN YOU.

    Its a sticky situation as to whether you allow the kids to see her. I guess it comes down to: What is most beneficial for the children...?

    If Grandma can show them lots of love while they are together, then they should Probably associate with Grandma. However, if she pulls out the My Book of Bible Stories whenever they are there, or makes them feel guilty for celebrating a birthday....well, that's a different situation

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